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Losing weight aint that hard

I am so glad I have Timehop on my phone. Its an App and everyday I can scroll back and see what I did last year and up to 5-6 years ago. Looking at the old photos, I realised how taukeh soh my face was. In Chinese face reading, it is good for women to have some plump face because it denotes good luck. So they say that kind of face brings luck for the husband.

Abuden, to get that sort of face, one is definitely pumped up with so much foods. And to have so much foods, one has to be rich lah. So what face reading lah, it is just pure commonsense.

Here is my photo taken in 2014 fat lilian

I wont label myself as fat. And I do hate people who categorise me as plump too. Damn, I get very sensitive if anyone dare say me fat lah. Unless the person is my evil biological brother or my very good male frens. Not female frens, only males.

Since April this year, which is like 4 months ago, I had taken that big bold step to finally lose weight and work real hard to shed those pounds. So far, I have lost 8 KGs. It is pure sweat to get those fats out. No supplements, no killer diet, change of eating habits, five times a week of Zumba and hardcore workout.

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It is kind of silly for a 51 years old fat lady to skip rope like a 5 years old kid. But never mind, second childhood, for the sake of burning fats, I will do it. Of course, you cannot lose weight by skipping. This pic is just for show. Our actual workout routine is much more complicated.

Still I just want to note down that I have started the first few steps and hopefully I will maintain this lifestyle and not die of heart attack before I am 55.

Why you get Unfriended

Back in the early 2000s, when blogging was the thing to do, everyone thought they have rights to comment and pushed their worthless opinions through.  Now I am laughing at how obnoxious I was in my Obnoxious page.  These were what I wrote back then.  Funnily enough, I still stand by those rules.

The thing is, on Facebook, I cannot tell people to just shut up because it is free.  So what I could do was to Unfriend the person.

These I wrote back in 2003, not today.

1. I am a Catholic, this blog is not.
2. I am a nice person, sometimes this blog is not.
3. I blog with one purpose, no one has to know what.
4. Either love me or ignore me.
5. I pay for this site. Every alphabets, I pay for.
6. Every alphabets you typed (as in the comments) are paid by me.
7. I don’t enjoy criticism so forget it. Pile on your jokes, thoughts, opinions, greetings, expressions, anything. I welcome them. But don’t ever try to be smarter than me.
8. I may twist your words, so don’t bother to try (criticising).
9. I am not what you read.
10. This blog is not the gospel truth.
11. You won’t find any mumbo-jumbo on literatures, classical musics, books I read or any stuffs like that. I am illiterate, uneducated but very smart and sharp. Don’t play-play.
12. As far as I am concerned, I am the smartest, loveable, sensible, patience, responsible, patriotic, tolerant person on earth. Don’t argue with me.
13. I am also the most humble, forgiving, helpful, devoted, caring, wisest person on earth. Also don’t argue with me. (and more adjectives will be added on)
14. I have no fear of (my own) death, sickness, pain, failures because I had been through a lot. So, no problems can faze me. Nothing is impossible.
15. I rely 100% on God. God is my answer, pillar of strength, rock, shield and guiding light. Don’t question my faith.
16. I have 5 kids. Hence, 5xmom. One of them has passed away. He is my source of inspiration. I know what is pain, heartache, disappointment, frustration, fears, desperation, end-of-the-world feelings.
17. X can sometime denotes extreme. In everything.
18. I live for others.
19. I live for God.
20. What you see may not be what you get. I get very annoyed and sarcastic if anyone should judge me based on this blog. Or even worse, based on one single entry they read.
So beware. Love me or leave me alone.

And from here on – written today July 27 2015 in FB age.

And here are why you get Unfriend :
1. You are stupidly annoying like leaving comments with Hello Lilian.  Like doh…do I even know you? Or care to know you?

2. You Like every freaking, single update of mine.  Can you imagine the horrors of waking up in the morning and find 20 Likes from the same person for every single pix I posted? Get a life, if you have an itch, scratch it, not Like it.

3.  You think you know me so well, you got to comment on every thought I said aloud.  I have a very liquid mind and my fingers can type awfully fast.  So a FB is just like a place where I achoooo…and then, I move on doing something else.  Usually I posted more regularly when I am busy writing boring work stuffs.  It is like taking little piss to release the boring tension.  My life does not stay there, so I hate being reminded of things I update.  So don’t give me advices over something I babbled 5 minutes or 5 days ago.  I don’t need them.

4. You are a male and I find you disgusting because either you are chauvinist, pervert or just plain boring.

 

5. You are a female and I think you ought to get a life of your own and not lord over me instead.

 

 

Anyway…sorry if there are way too many ads on this blog.  LOL I have not touch the blog for a long time and I am too lazy to find out where I stuffed those ads code.  So lazy to meddle with them, live with it, ok?

 

This is me.

A friend, or is he a relative? hmmm…really I don’t know how to categorise some people. Its funny, though. How we never talk when we were kids because of wrong channel and then, much older, I totally tuned out. But 5 decades later, we somewhat clicked. I don’t know and don’t care how he got these description of me. But the thing is quite accurate. So I am going to copy and paste the nice things about me here. I am going to highlight those points that I like to believe is so-me.

At 50, I can say I am quite settled with life and know where I am heading. Well, I do not know where I am heading but I always have that lofty ideals that someday I will just throw my life into doing things like feeding the poor in some organised soup kitchen paid by guilty-rich-people wanting to unload their guilt LOL and nourishing the minds of the downtrodden with motivating stuffs or crazy ideas like staying in some comfortable wifi-connected, aircond, no mozzies, nice clean toilets jungle teaching kids about Jesus or be involved as a counsellor to screwed up youths and women. Or be one of those people whom you can talk to when you are dying or the one who hovers around dying people or at morque. Really, these are things that thrill me because it is not ordinary.

So when my friend or is it relative gave me these, I was like ‘shit, he got a winner!’ (of whatever he used to analyse this). Don’t ask me where I got this. Cos I also dunno and I don’t want to know.

Oh ya, I am going to be vain a bit and post a pic with each blog post.  So here goes my cycling photo.

 

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Chan Lilian Life Path number is 11, a person with great intuition. Eleven is actually the most intuitive of all the numbers. You are very sensitive to your surroundings and have an amazing understanding of others. This helps you discover many a things that are going on behind the scenes. Examples of such sensitivity would be being able to sense others relationships or health without knowing them. You can use your strengths to greatly help others. This life path number is called Master Number 11 or 11/2. This number combines all the traits of number 1 twice over, and at the same time includes all the characteristics of highly charged number 2.

Spiritually aware, a visionary, inspiring, charismatic, inventive, a dreamer, idealistic and a deep thinker. You rely on faith rather than logic to deal with the life and all it has to offer. Much is expected of you having the master number eleven. Your purpose in life is give inspiration to others. You possess an inordinate amount of energy and intuition, and you can inspire people even without much effort. Take full advantage of your powers you must develop yourself sufficiently and surrender yourself to higher ideals. You will find success in fields that let you be a teacher, diplomat or speaker. All fields where you can utilize your considerable talents at uplifting and inspiring others.

When The Obnoxious 5xmom loses her Obnoxiouness

I just realised I have not blogged for months. I wonder why? I think I have sort of betrayed self when I stopped cussing, stop ranting, stop condemning, stop criticising, stop pointing out, stop being obnoxious.

It is of course nice that I am being good. But I realised I can soon be sucked into the fake world that normal people live in. You know….the kind where they are all goody-goody, holey-moley for the sake of looking good.

It is partly Facebook fault. When I want to say something, I have to remember the wide spectrum of silly people who think they own my life, my manners, my character bla bla bla and they think they have the privilege to comment like I invite them to.

So, I stopped. Sometimes I wrote a 3-4 para of things and then, delete it. Facebook is no fun for cursing people because even if I am only ranting on one person, 9,999 others think it is about them.

Maybe I should just come back to my blog and blast people and put a disclaimer that it is none of their business. I can also close my comment and let those constipated people feel like they are going to explode with their own shits and yet can’t find a place to put their two cents worth.

Oh I insert a collage of my pix during my hike to Monkey Beach because I can. And also to remind myself who I am.

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Really, the world is no fun when it is so full of fake people. You ended up with these people around. At work, at church, at just anywhere. Its worse when you can’t say it out loud.

Two weeks ago, I had some soul searching and I decided that I want to be less bitchy. I believe I will have less problems once I Let It Go of all the things that pissed me.

Two weeks later, I think I am only partially right. I think if I start being the sweet, tolerant, embracing person, I will morphed into the kind zombie that so many people are.

So maybe during those soul searching, when the Word of Let It Go came into my mind, God was probably asking me to Blast it, Slap them, Say it and Let It Go, not hold back. After all, it is being Christian to be true to ourself.

This little entry is to remind myself not to be a meek, in effective, fake, run of the mill, souless person. Let It Go, say what you mean Lilian, and never be afraid to point out the obvious.

Happy 12 years conversion to me myself and I.

This actually started out as a FB status. But then, I started recalling my conversion as a Catholic.

So it is Saturday. Easter Vigil. And I can celebrate 12 years of being baptised as a Catholic with my four sons. Hubby is going Cheng Beng but I cannot join him cos I need to send my little boy for Easter mass practice. Before that, I used to be chief organiser of Cheng Beng, taking care of all the nitty gritty stuffs, from tea foods cakes to paper stuffs for burning etc etc. After conversion, I no longer involve myself because to me, my parents-in-law, uncle in law, grandparents in law are all in a better place. God will take care of everything. All I bring will be a bunch of flowers.

I still insist my kids go along with their father but many times, it clashed with Easter/church camps/school/work etc. Anyway, I hope my kids will take over hubby’s duty someday, of clearing graves and paying a visit to their ancestors’ resting places. We have 3 different locations to cover, 5 persons to pay respect to.

So, Happy 12 years as Catholic, Lilian. Jesus loves you, Chan Lilian​. :)

I was probably the only woman with engorged breasts and post-partum bleeding who went through her RCIA rites, driving with caesarean stitches and painkillers. Cos I was one eager-beaver Chinese woman who wanted to embrace Christ.

I analysed myself why I mention Cheng Beng and Easter Vigil (the night when people get baptised as Catholics) in one breath. And I guess it is a transformation for me. Or you can say resurrection.

I used to idolised many gods because that was how I was brought up. Cheng Beng was my responsibility as a daughter-in-law because my late mother-in-law bequeath her duty to me as she was getting older and frail. I took it seriously and did marvellously for several years or maybe over a decade.

So when I wanted to turn to Christ, it wasn’t an easy decision because I had that guilt of ‘abandoning’ my old practices. But the RCIA took a year and I had time to slowly detach the old practices.

Unlike some misinterpretations, as Christians we pray for our deceased loved ones. Everyday. We live with the assurance that our loved ones die and live again in Heaven with God. Everything is provided for. So we don’t need to offer earthly stuffs.

Twelve years and I can say I got along pretty well. Nothing to shout about but I didn’t drop off midway. Kids are doing well, some closer to church than others but all have Christ foundation.

Yes I Thank You Lord.

Feeling blessed on Christmas

Last night, I had a blessed Christmas makan at my place. There was no standing room and people spilled to the balcony and foyer. But truly, it is the most blessed Christmas of all since I converted in 2003. Looking back an old post in 2004 where I felt depressed having no direction how to celebrate the real meaning of Christmas, I say the Lord has been good to me. Really great to me and praise be to God!

The food was nice, the people was wonderful, the atmosphere was really Christmas and most of all, the carolers and their chaperons all gave me the true meaning of Christmas. I can now say I celebrate Christmas like a Christian!

I lighted candles at my little unfinished, work-in-progress altar (cos I haven’t find one Jesus statue or crib I like yet) and carols filled the air. We said a little prayer of thanksgiving and everyone makan!

So Blessed Christmas everyone! Tonight, God send His Son so that no one may die but have eternal life! May you feel the Blessed Lord in your life too.

“How do you feel?”

“How do you feel?” is a question that we often asked in our counselling course. It must be said with such feelings, using your hands, with palms open and do that fanning up from the heart to conjure up feelings.

I spent 100 hours in counselling course and I got a certificate signed by the Bishop. It costed me money, of course but it was a good soul searching time. I changed a lot after that. Now you can no longer find the F-word on my blog and I think the word OBNOXIOUS dropped from my blog banner too.

Anyway, over the last couple of days, a few girlfriends had asked ‘What does it feel to be 50?’

Well, let me try to think what difference there is between 49 years old 364 days and 50 years old. Well, nothing.

I started my birthday on a very spiritual and faith-laden day. I had plenty of time to ponder about what I am going to do for the rest of my life. Well, not really but at least I know I am into something that I have always wanted to do – mission.

With that tame, proper and prim start, I suppose it is time to grow old LOL.

At the same time, someone I don’t really know well but know fondly passed away. I got teary over it over and over again because of the sudden loss. He was only 51. So it hits home that I better live life fully. His death and the outpouring of grief on his FB taught me to be nicer to people. I want to be nicer because I don’t want the world to clap and cheer LOL. I want strangers cry over me LOL.

Initially beginning of this year, I had that crazy thought that to celebrate the BIG 50, I should have some hen party kinda celebration. You know…when you are that old, you don’t need to be so ‘nice girl’ anymore. But nay….fate had it that I spend it in a reflective weekend with churchie people doing Jesus-y things.

So yeah, nothing life changing being a 5-series. So far, not yet. I still get my period LOL so that means I am not menopausal yet. Maybe I will celebrate the next milestone – when I don’t need to buy tampons anymore. Wonder what I will do with spare tampons should the Aunt Flo decided to stop, huh? Use it to plug my nose when I have runny nose? Use it to stuff my ears if it is too noisy?