I love Zig Ziglar and of course, I agree with most of the things he wrote. Here’s what he said about Quality Time, taken from his book ‘Raising Positive Kids in a Negative World’.
The question of quality time is one that has been kicked around for several years. Initially it was, in my opinion, a term invented by the “experts” and used by many parents as well as husbands and wives as a cop-out. They justified their lack of time with their children or mate by using the phrase as a catchall, as an excuse for the limited time they spent with their loved ones.
As adults, we can label what is quality time and what is not. But then, how do we expect our kids to tune from normal to quality? Are we there for them when they really need us badly or when they have something proud to share with us? Do they have a built in tuner that says… ok, I shall keep my hurts or my joys until it is quality time with mom and dad. No! So, we are kidding ourselves if we say ‘oh, I do not spend much time with my kids but hey, it is the quality that counts, not the quantity’.
Is this full-time mom here hitting on the conscience of others? Of course not! I do spend a lot of time (‘cos I am forced to!) with my kids but those are not necessary quality time. But knowing that I have more ‘normal’ time available to tune to ‘quality’ time on the demands of my kids is certainly better than say, to allocate every Saturday morning to ‘do’ quality time.
So, like Zig says, quality time is a myth cooked up by guilty parties!