Toddler for adoption – while geram lasts

1.30 pm – 5xmom all dressed up, camera check, milk check, diapers check. Gang up 2 yrs old toddler and 8 yrs son to go out and pick #2 son and jalan-jalan plus makan-makan
2.30 pm – 5xmom on the verge of jumping down the window ledge (3rd floor, so if lucky can die also)
3.30 pm – contemplating getting a divorce lawyer, run away to a monastery, be a nun, tell my kids to find another mother with better patience, as soon as Ah Huat the locksmith is here. (twinsmom said maybe Ah Huat has rainbow colour hair) So, if Ah Huat wants me, I elope with him also never mind.
4.30 pm – waiting for apom like want to faint. (finally picked a black face son who had waited for 2 long hours)
5.30 pm – re-enactment of crime scene
6.00 pm – if 5xmom doesn’t blog this, will really jump from the ledge. Look at the indignant way toddler is taunting me.
6.30pm – adoption offer expired liao because cannot resist the puppy eyes

Type of day – A thousand farking #$@#?!!@# phooo-key day

  • On one of those rare days when I want to go out to pick my #2 son, my toddler lost my house keys; (it is hang very high but to this monkey, nowhere is too high)
  • My eldest son who has the key finished earlier and had gone out with friends, straight from school
  • Call the ATM in his air-con, plush carpet, surrounded with SYTs office, he gave a million suggestions that doesn’t work, like use a screw driver to open the screws of the lock, grab all the keys at home and try, ask neighbours to lend me their keys, get his brother to buy a key with the same number, find his niece (part-time helper) who has our home key, search within the toddler’s reacheable level, search again, search somemore, lagi search….
  • 5xmom and 8 years old son sweated, crawled, face flat on the floor, look under cabinets, drawers, laundry, potty, toilet bowls, 100 pairs of shoes, rice urn, just anything for whole blardy 2.5 hours and still cannot find the farking keys
  • toddler is at an age when he is able to tell simple things so 5xmom asked a million time where key and he showed every direction except the window
  • 5xmom terribly worried about #2 son as he is the kind who will sit there in the hot sun waiting indefinitely, hungry, hot, tired…. (called the school clerk and they reluctantly call him, school doesn’t allow h/p)
  • 5xmom looked out the window ledge for at least 5 times but can’t see the keys there because it was too near the edge (toddler has criminal records of throwing Nokia phone with all the ex-flames numbers plus a lot of other things, except soiled panties, thank goodness or else the DOM will be lining downstairs like Romeo and Juliet)
  • just as 5xmom wants to pull the bed away to open the windows grill (usually lock or else kids will take flying lessons), the bed krreeaak (maybe due to tsunami tremors lah)
  • 5xmom has to risk a limb to get the key
  • later found that there are two more sets in the car (which ATM had been insisting that the keys are at home)

Moral of the story – If you lost a key, call a locksmith, never your husband. If you want to have babies, think twice, triple, sextuple and never ‘Just do it’.

Ending : Just as Ah Huat the locksmith is about to reach my house, I found the key. And the same time, my helper also return call. Grrr….so mad I have no fate with Ah Huat. Or took that leap just now, then I can feed everyone with live blogs from Heaven.