Gay, transexual, bapok – I am confused!

Few days ago, around midnight, my kids craved for roti tisu. So, off we went to the mamak restaurant.

Since it is way past midnight, I willed myself not to eat but just sitting there waiting for the kids to wallop the roti tisu. My eyes darted around the mamak restaurant (this one with air-con wan) and saw a father with his son. The father is a bit weird ‘cos he is balding but kept his hair rather longish and the part near his ears seem to be longer. He seems so busy answering call after call. Oh ya, got one long fingernail, typical China-man.

The son pulak – hair blondish, small size, wear a singlet, revealing his bony body, on his wrist he wore a leather strap with metal studs. His belt oso the same style, metal studs. And on his neck, dangle a huge chain. Thank God he did not wear a fashionable cross or else sure kena my curse. Jeans – blue and torn. Boots – huge one.

My reaction was – wah…..this father so sporting, allowing his son to wear like that and they seems to have a lot to talk. So gentle somemore, the father. He wasn’t eating but the son was eating nasi kandar. I got all maternal and fuzzy over them ‘cos hey, I was also sitting there waiting for the kids to eat mah.

So, I am sort of bonded with another parent. But ALAMAK!!!!! after a few minutes, I realised that this cannot be a father and son pair. Things started to get weird when the hands started flailing when the young guy started talking. (he was eating earlier so no time do that) And the papa, oh shit, he is no longer a papa but looks like bapak ayam (pimp).

I was thankful ‘cos my older sons had their back against them. Otherwise, how to explain?

After the young guy finished his food, both went to the cashier and without doubt, they were definitely NOT NORMAL. The old guy was standing soooooo close to the young one. Skin to skin contact.

Now, wait a minute. It is none of my business what they are. But it is certainly my business to wonder what is becoming of us?

Few weeks back, I had observed that there are many young men who are acting effeminate whereby, they will be lemah-lembut. They look normal but their actions aren’t.

So, I asked ‘someone’ why males can be so girlish. I asked if it was a defective genes and whether they can go for hormone treatment. The knowledgeable guy told me that this is due to psychological problem whereby the boys must have been influenced by the dominant mother at home. He explain in great detail that sometimes, some homes have mothers who are of the dominant trait. This is from his experience in working in mental hospital. Of course, I cannot entirely verify if this is true.

I am rather confused with these terms and hope someone can enlightened me.

Gay = normal guys who only prefer sexual relationship with a male
Bi-sexual = guys who swing both way
Transexual = A person whom had undergone operation to change sex
Bapok = guys who dressed as women

Am I right? And then, has there been an increase in these numbers in our country because they seem very public nowadays.

*Note : I have no discrimination on the above category of people because they really do not concern me. We live in peace. However, I have a strong stand in this matter because same sex relationship is wrong and is sinful. It is against the Catholics faith and in the olden days, it was said that God killed a whole nation in Sodom and Gomorrah because they practised same sex relationship. This is mentioned in both the Quran and Bible. Are we heading back to doom?*

Argggghhh….please don’t flame me. I only write what I saw. If you are a gay and get pissed with what I said, please tell me why I shouldn’t think badly of gays. I need to learn.

25 Replies to “Gay, transexual, bapok – I am confused!”

  1. Study first, besok comment. Read liao though. Nowadays have to think twice before I write comment, before I kena shoot by my own kai-ma. -.-“

  2. hmmm… maybe you notice more of ‘them’ because malaysian society is becoming more tolerant and progressive. but after reading your post, i rather doubt it…

  3. i guess it is true. their surroundings does play a factor on the psychology of children. but how big this is, i don’t know.

    whether a person is gay or straight, i do not care. seriously i don’t. but what sexuality you are doesn’t matter if you are rude, impolite and do not know where your limits are. you can be whatever you want to be, but please be a decent human being, eh?

  4. Human beings always on da look for something new, something that would excites them, give them a new life, a new reason to life for. In da midst of searching .. some of them got sesatED and ended up doubting their own identity …. at least dats how i sees it.

    I was once in Germany alone in a foreign pub, besides me sits a bapok. He offered me sex I said “NO” he asked me “why” I told him i dont like the idea of seing him naked, he then reply “you havent try me yet, how do you know you dont like me?” *poke own throat to induce vomitting* Wuekkkk!!!!!

  5. I am commenting purely on Gay/Les (not bi-sexual or bapok). I have many gay and lesbian friends…dunno coincidental or what, but I can sniff if one is near. And I am very close to them, maybe b’cos they know I dun despise them. I tried to know why they are or become gay/les. From what I gather, I would say..environment/family has great impact on their lives. Take for instance…my les pal came from a broken family, his dad/brothers…has mistresses/gfs. Her bro-in-law molested her. She lost trust in men. As for my gay friends…some is due to peer influence…some…could not find love within family, and being in all boys school, they got confused over friends’ love. I guess there are many other reasons.
    And they have actually tried having relationship with the opposite gender…just that they prefer the same. My main point is…these gays…they are more caring and sensitive. I find it easier to consult them and trust them. They are my best pals. I am not saying I am supporting them to be gays/les…but just accepting them as who they are.

  6. Seriously … i have nothing against them.. nor for them.. but my view.. is to please leave them alone.. they got enough problems as it is already.. and no need to have to handle our questions. I mean.. how would you like for someone to ask you to justify your every action or being..??? not very likely to like it right..???
    So my stand is .. donch go and bother them.. leave them alone.. give them some peace..!!!!

  7. transvestite is a cross dresser.. not sure what a bapok is.
    Hey gay guys are the best roomates.. they are very neat 🙂
    I have great gay guy friends who are a joy to go shopping with whether for clothing or house decor however I must admit , I do not have any lesbian friends.. being female I feel too threatened.

  8. Just to summarise:
    Something that is acceptable does not make a wrong become right.

    As Chris has pointed out above :
    “because malaysian society is becoming more tolerant and progressive.”

    Progressive?

    I am talking about the issue. The issue is WHY. The reasons as given by some of you is -the SOCIETY.

    As I said earlier, I am not targetting the individuals but I want to know why. And as I can see it, we think it is ok to practice same sex relationship because we think this is part of being ‘progressive’ and it is acceptable because people are getting ‘tolerant’. Fine if these are adults who can make their own decision. But have we thought of the huge majority of growing children? If they also think in line of acceptable, then wouldn’t that leads to even more gay/lesbian practice?

    I am looking at a very big picture whereby many people are turning their back against what is right and what is wrong and do things simply because it is acceptable.

  9. yes Romantic ur right transvestite is a cross dresser,”Hence the Mardi Gras”

    Well i know a few gay guys and some since ther were little boys that my son went to school with.Although my son won’t speak to them now ,not at all.I do say hi if i see them and of course ask how there parents are ect.Actually only a few weeks ago my daughter
    aged 13 was with me doing the shopping ,after leaving a store she asked me isn’t that blah blah
    yes i said,She then asked is that the gay guy ,didn’t he use to come to our place wen i was really little.I said yes ,she then asked me why do i talk to him ,his gay.I said because he speaks nice to me and treats me with respect ,so i speak nice to him.
    My personal thoughts are is not up to me to judge him.
    cheers

  10. I have two closet gay friends. From their stories, it seems like they were sexually abused by older men whenthey were young. Now they prefer men. Is there a connection?

  11. Was actually having a chat about this issue with some friends yesterday. We realised that at some point in their lives, most gay people (according to what they told us)have wished that they were born straight i.e. normal in society’s eyes. So i guess that they are also trying to deal with a lot of issues on a daily basis, that we take for granted.

  12. Love is blind. Can’t help much.

    THe first difference between those terms is the spelling. All has different spelling. The second difference is:
    Bapok/Pondan/Ah-Kua : Mostly from Lorong Haji Taib. Their attitude are more to females. Maybe their female hormones are more that the male wan. Some wear skirts, blouses and bras. Some have high frequency voice.
    Gay : Prefer to go with male. But still can see their man-ness.
    Transexual : Already resurrected. Can’t help.

    Me think all these a strong stand in this matter because same sex relationship is wrong and is sinful and cannot continue their ‘zuriat’. But yet, love is blind.

  13. i have read the link above on bible and homosexuality. all i can say is this. Christians have been given the Holy Spirit and He lives right in us. He will be our guide to know what is right and wrong in God’s eyes. If you say homosexuality and lesbianism is OK, then we shall see who is right on Judgment Day. Let the almight be the judge.

  14. I know some gay friends on the internet and I do think that they’re more sensitive to personal issues and such, but some of them have said that one of the reasons they rather choose partners of the same gender was because they previously had relationship problems with females and in turn lost almost all interest in females… It’s just one reason, so don’t take my word for it… =P

  15. i know a man…no wait…he was a female, but now became a male. and is married with a female 2 years ago. (thats female married to female) but im not sure whether he did any operation now. he was asking me to do a website about transexual for him.

  16. anyway, anyone of u watch the “journey with jason” on astro AEC? jason used to interview a lady (who was a man). he (she) was and still is a doctor and singer now.

  17. bisexual can mean both sexes.. not only guys.. girls aso ;p both aso want

    i wonder how would it feel if you find out that your anak is gay.. hmm auntie lilian?

    i guess the world is being more open to all these stuff already.. it’s legal to get married to the same sex in some places now rite? honestly i don’t know why is this happening and all.. i don’t htink anyone would know..

    i watched a tv program b4.. can’t remember what was it.. about children as young as 4 years old, already acting like the other sex.. and eventually.. sex change.. it’s sumtin like the guy hormones somehow ended up in her body and vice versa.. born like that.. don’t know.. haha but dont u think it kinda sucks? at such young age already know that they are not the right sex..

    a female trapped in a man’s bother and vice versa? i think that really sucks..

  18. *busy installing software tak mau comment much or create flame (hobby) ahaha*

    well i respect the existent of gay. whatever they wanna do with their sexual-orientation is none of my business. well if they’re catholic, then maybe i would say they’re wrong, coz their actions contradict their faith.

    else lesbian then lesbian. ohya btw i lurve lesbians i think they’re very cool. gay not so.. 😛

  19. I got an African friend. He told me that in his society, if anyone has the tendency to become gayish or even lembut, they will rumble him to death! Scary huh.

  20. i would say that these issues are very subjective…
    for gay people doesn’t want to be gay
    is just a preferences…like how you like your red durian…

    on bapok, well it could be due to their excessive female hormones….too much soy bean can increase your progestrone and estrogen

    as on right or wrong….
    right in the sense of human rights….
    wrong perhaps in the sense of religion….

    now even have gay animal….

  21. while it can be due to the environment, a person’s sexual preference is mostly inherent, that is it boils down to the genes. Some are born naturally attracted to people of same sex (without being influenced by any party).

    As long as they do not breach the law or commit crimes thorough their lives, I believe respect is very important.

  22. I am going to comment just a little.

    Penny asked what if my sons are gay? Well, I will stand by them and flame whoever dare to say anything about them. It is very important that the parents stand by their kids.

    And since Buaya had seen the link provided, I shall not ruse my own feathers to read it. I take Buaya’s word bulat-bulat.

  23. i just love your programme!
    even my mother don’t understand, but she still watch with me!!
    i love your style and everything about you.
    i hope to visit you one day after my spm.
    i like this programme very much, it really make me understand about people and respect them..
    thank you jason!

    ps: do u produce a vcd of all the interview u made, because i didn’t watch the other

  24. Hi, you honestly shouldn’t care who people want to date nor have sex with. How does their action affect you? And as for you using your religion as an excuse, you need to be more informed. The Catholic Church does not condemn homosexuals nor transsexuals. The church only condemns a sexual relationship between unmarried couples, whether it be heterosexual or homosexual. Therefore, since homosexual couples are not permitted to marry in the Roman Catholic Church, homosexual sexual intercourse is not permitted. You, on the otherhand should never ever judge a homosexual or transsexual person just because of their orientation. Transsexuality and Homosexuality are both psychiatric conditions. It is never a sin to be homosexual or transsexual, after all, no homosexual or transsexual person ever chose to be born that way. If you could not choose the gender you were born in, could they? Homosexuals and transsexuals are encouraged by the church to live a chaste and holy life. Whether they do or not, that should not be of your concern. Everyone is given the freedom of choice.

    And the only reason I can tell you all this is because I am a Transsexual….
    and a practicing Roman Catholic too.
    and to reaffirm you, I have spoken to 3 priests about it, and none of them condemn homosexuals nor transsexuals.

    Peace.

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