How flattering can this be? I was made into a wrapper for a packet of economy fried beehoon costing RM0.80?
I have made no secrets that I always find it hard to fit into my in-laws side. If you think one mother-in-law is bad, wait till you hear about my 5 mothers-in-laws. Nope, my father-in-law did not marry 5 wives. It is just that he got four very domineering, ‘know-it-all’ daughters who are old enough to be my huband’s mother. Yes, my MIL was pregnant with my hubby along with her two daughters. Ewwwss…I can’t imagine that!
Being a young bride, a hot-blooded one who cannot take criticism nor well-intention but dumb (imho) advices, life was hellish back then. But through the years, I had earned some respect from them due to my apple polishing skills, making my late MIL’s shoes extremely shiny. Moreover, none of my 4 SILs can cook like me. So, I am one-upper in that way. And that’s the only, single, one thing. I still have to take the comments on how bad I disciplined my kids, take care of their health, keep my house, choose my eggs, painted the house blah blah.
Still, I never fit in. So, I keep a distance except for a few ‘must do’ gatherings. Since this is the Ching Ming weekend, I have to face my 4 MIL-wannabes (or I sometimes tell my friends, Cindrella’s step-sisters)
I never told them what I do in my free time other than sleeping. Yes, they caught me sleeping at odd hours whenever they phoned my sons. My kids are pretty good at telling white lies to cover up for me.
So, I always have this low self-esteem when compared to them. One was a pig rearer’s wife, next a joss-sticks shop taukeh soh, third one a minimarket owner and fourth one, a motorbike mechanic shop. All of them are pretty hardworking, earning decent money. Unlike me, sleep and eat at the expenses of their little, baby brother (my hubby la). And some of them wear spaghetti strap tops and mini skirts (at 50 years old!). They also go on overseas holidays in a group.
Well, even if my face has been plastered in the papers so often, I never got a chance to explain to them what is internet, forum, group support, breastfeeding etc. Until one day when God must have taken the matters into His own hands. Love you, God!
News archive available here.
I wouldn’t call it co-incidence. I call it God’s intervention to make me feel good. And boy, do I feel good when yesterday, SIL#3 took out this old, almost torn piece of newspaper to show to her 3 sisters and 3 brothers (bleargh, I married into a family of 8 siblings). If you think that my atm would call every damn person alive on earth to tell them how great his wife is, well, unfortunately no. Sometimes, I even wonder if he reads the paper about me. (no, I am not complaining, we exist like this peacefully)
Well, if I sound like I am bragging, yes, I am. You have to know how hard I had gone through, done how much to get where I am now. I feel good that now, I can ‘measure’ up in some ways. This is really silly and unimportant to others but to me, it means a whole lot. Because if I can’t rear pigs, repair bikes, take care shops, wear miniskirts and spaghetti tops, go holidays with my own sisters minus kids, at least I can run many other things, maintain a blog inclusive.
No compliments, please. I am not asking. What I wanted to say is sometimes, it is easy for us to do things for strangers, shine at other places but in our own family circle, we feel inadequate, insignificant and frustrated. Life is like that, I guess.