The news in the paper about a group of school boys given a crew cut has made me ponder long and hard.
First, I try to put myself as one of the parents. My sons are about that age too. So it is not hard to imagine. How would I feel?
– This will be a time when the trust between a parent and child comes in. Would I believe my son or would I believe what I want to believe? Will I take a hard swipe at the police, school and everyone, except my son? Will I stand on my son’s side even if he is one of the culprit? Will I spin some tales to make sure that my son did not spoil my reputation? Arggghhh…I feel a failure because I really do not know what to do. I am the kind of parent who has strong principles and I believe it will mean being an unkind parent. I will not protect my own son if I know he is wrong. I will probably be the first to punch my son if he gets into trouble. Only God knows how I will react if I see my son’s face on the paper, displayed like a criminal.
So, the only consolation I have is to make sure that the line of communication between my teenage kids are kept open all the time. Parenting teenagers is really hard work.
MAD WITH THE MEDIA
NOW, I AM REALLY MAD with the media. Please, what are you guys trying to do? Whose side are you on? Why do you have to add pepper and salt to the issue? Why can’t your reporters and photographers spare these kids? Why do you have to make it like the police, discipline master, headmaster, school, parents and kids act like they are all liars? Can’t your reporter get the facts straight before writing? Is it necessary to stir up the public’s emotions?
The reason I am mad is because these poor kids, whether innocent or otherwise, are on papers, looking like criminals. How do you think they feel? What do you think they will do in future? Can’t the photographer take a back view of them because bald heads look good from the back? If I am one of the boys, I would either do:
Choice A : Be very embarassed and turned into a recluse. Keeping away from everyone. Be a school drop-out.
Choice B : Live up to the notorious reputation, be a real gangster someday.
Is this what we want to happen to these kids? HECK, NO!!! We are imposing enough hurts. Spare them the embarrassment. Don’t use them to sell more newspapers.
I am real angry because I notice that the papers are always protecting the faces of some celebrities, politicians, businessmen, Datuks, Tan Sri’s sons etc even when it is proven that they had killed, raped, molest, khalwated, road rage-d (?), CBT etc. Yet, the papers have no problem plastering innocent, weak people faces on their front page. I find this disgusting.
Not long ago, the woman who was accused of abusing her Indon maid was on the front page before she was found guilty. Few days later, another man (presumbably someone richer and more well-known) who was proven guilty of raping his Indon maid was hidden from the paper. Why the double standard?
I am going to email this link to the Editor of The Star. So, people, please read the news, look at the faces of the boys and share your opinions. Do you think they deserved to be punish this way? Whom do we punish? The media, of course!
I come from a rather kampung community where teachers are regarded as GODDESS! When I entered primary one, my father told the teacher during registration that I liked maths and english, and if i am even naughty, cane the little bugger. And if i get canned in school, or even got a little scholding, my dad will double the amount at home. so yeah.. whatever it is, the little bugger is in the losing end.. so thoughout my primary school i hardly get myself into much troubles. to know what little village buggers can get into, read LAT!
whenever i got canned in primary school, i never dare to complain to my mum, coz mum will say “veli good”. Kids r over protective, teachers are not appreciated n valued by some parents coz they think that teacher responsibilities are just to teach their son n daughter to write ABC n count 123 for exam purposes. Parents should always communicate with teachers in school, parents r just like the middle man between them, listen to both side be4 making the final judgement n decisions.
Media? They sux today! The objectives n strategy has moved to entire profit making…its so pathetic..
Bah, those prepubescent kids deserve it. And Lilian, this kinda thing is part and parcel or growing up and life in secondary school. Don’t let the kids grow up into some whining ah kua.
Hi Paul, I can’t say for sure if the bunch of boys shown in the paper deserve it. But I do agree that parents nowadays are the one at fault, being overprotective yet neglecting the basic needs of the children. Giving material needs instead of love.
MMG – Yeah, that’s the spirit! You agree with me. I wrote to the Editor last night. Keeping my fingers crossed they will look into my point of views.
Neeshen – My father was a very, very garang teacher from Bayan Lepas. And all my bros and sisters kena from him real bad. I learnt the principles from him, though he died when I was very young (7 yrs old). I too always tell the teacher, pukul sama dia (my kids), jangan bagi muka. Last time, I wrote an article in the Star about not spare the rod.
Archive here:
http://www.mymomsbest.com/news_articles/rotan.htm
Hey i remember that article… 🙂 i read it when i was in form 4 form 5 ish.
Anyway I do think the kids deserve to be punish but their photos shouldn’t be pasted around like criminals. Kids will be kids.. please don’t tell me that no one never had a scuffle when they were young and foolish?
Yeah, which reminds me of the Black Metal Issue sometime late 2002. Poor kids. It’s dissapointing how quickly a label is plastered whenever a face is put up on the papers.
Personally, I woud be pissed off with school and police, and I would make hell break lose. Serious.
Secondly, would tell my kid that at least he is in the newspaper. Hey, comeon, we were all nasty, when we were kids. I was arrested as well, sneaked into movies without paying, got drunk and came home at 3.00AM in the morning. I now know the pain that my parents went through, and learn from it, but the main lessson is to trust your child – over and over and over again. Correct them, yes, but dont tweak them too hard. Most of them – 99.99999999% will turn out right.
oh lilian – you don’t have a trackback – how now?
You’re a good ‘un, Lilian, for bringing this matter up… but, hey, how come you’re reading The Star? I tell you what makes the BN so deadly boring. It’s a Victorian era party stranded in the 21st century, that’s why. The false piety and moral hypocrisy are leftovers from a different century when the pillars of society (especially the press) pretended to be goody-goody while in secret they did all kinds of things I can’t be bothered to mention lah. Same situation with the BN flers. Wanna tangkap people for being romantic in public while they themselves can rob, rape, gang-bang, even murder and get away scot-free. This is how an entire generation can be traumatized and become antisocial – because kids are not idiots, they can see right through the crap. That’s how they lose all respect for so-called authority at a tender age. That’s how I became a maverick myself. At age 11 I realized the headmaster was unreasonable and cruel and totally blind to the truth. That opened my eyes to all the phonies who wear black robes and white wigs and sit in judgment of others, the men in blue who arrest people for doing things they themselves do, and loudmouth politicians who exhort people to be honest and law-abiding while they themselves are the biggest crooks around. Respect must be mutual and it must be earned – not forced upon our young at rotan point.
antares – LOL. This post is dated April 2005. Two zero zero five lah! Aiyor.. 😆
But I read Star online mah. Sun Tzu Art of War advocates it..Which part? You can guess, right?