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Soya and big breasts

*This is just joke I shared with my husband hor? There is nothing more to it, ok?*

You see, coffee is my life. And atm (husband) said I tarak taste-si (no standard) ‘cos I only drink Aik Cheong kopi-o. Of course he can perli me lar, ‘cos he drinks Made-In-Italy expresso with his Italian colleagues everyday. Brewed with imported machine and beans.
kopi

The thing is, never perli me or else I will take revenge till the ends of the world.

ONE DAY, AT THE HYPERMARKET
5xdad buying cartons of soyabean milk.
5xmom into nagging mode
5xmom : Aiyoh, why buy so many cartons? Damn heavy.
5xdad : Healthy drinks.
5xmom : Healthy your head. The internet says that soya beans contain a lot of progesterone, the female hormones. Drink liao hor, can become pondans. (effeminate)
5xdad : Goodlah, then I can earn extra income at Lorong Gharu. With you spending like water, I need that money.

(Lorong Gharu is Penang infamous pondans backlane. You can find pondans there, service charge cheap-cheap only.)

ANOTHER DAY, IN THE KITCHEN
5xmom : Aiyoh, this fridge so damn packed liao. All your soya-bean milk la.
*Repeat the same thing about soya bean got female hormone yadda, yadda.*
5xdad : (tiu-ed liao) You ever seen a monk with big breasts or not?
5xmom : LOL! How I know wor? I never un-robe a monk before.

Remember – never leave a woman with nothing else to say in an argumement. Always give them ladder to come down. Otherwise, she will plot and plot to get even.

So, 5xmom did a very bad thing tonite. She grabbed the poor happy monk at home and took a photo of his big breasts, just to prove to 5xdad.
nenen

YESTERDAY, IN THE BEDROOM
5xmom still not satisfied about losing out on the soya-bean issue.
While putting on the SKII….
5xmom : AHAHHH……now I know why! You drink somemore the soyabean milk lah, *yadda the same hormones issue* You will end up like the monks. You will have no more ‘drive’. That time, tongkat ali also kenot save you liao.

(Some background info in case my overseas readers (chewah, as if I got any) do not comprehend. Vegetarians (like the Buddist monks) eat mostly soy-based products. These monks are all celibate, meaning, they do not engage in sexual intercourse. Tongkat ali is a Malaysian plant purported to work like Viagra.)

*As I mentioned above, these are jokes I exchanged with my husband. Nothing religious involved hor?*




28 Responses to “Soya and big breasts”

  1. OMG i must stay away from soya bean drinks already! But coffee contains caffein, not exactly very good for healthy either! Then, how? Buy Spritzer lah!

  2. Hilirious lah you .. lilian.. 🙂

  3. Tell your hubby aik cheong consider got class already. very fragrant. now we are using the sailor brand, not too long ago our coffee comes in kilos bought from the chinese shops.

  4. I really must stop drink soya bean drinks… and get my gf to drink more. WAHAHAHA.

  5. How about soy sauce. Maybe this other soya bean product can make ur [Ehemm] become darker huh… Can’t imagine lor. Whoa, how that gal to eat just plain char kue teow.

  6. reminds me of an email attachment i once received that detailed a woman’s experience with soya. thinking tat soya is v gd for health, she consumed it banyak-banyak since she was a teen, i think. then health problems started appearing despite doing regular exercise and maintaining a gd diet – lymph node got problem, and kena cancer also but still din realize the soya she drank was the culprit till too late.

  7. Hmm .. interesting, my brother like soya bean curd a lot. And he is getting ghayish lately … wonder if that has to do with it?
    Hehe

  8. aik cheong? the one in malacca one rite?

    eh my dad loves it tooo.his office plp drinks aik cheong only.

    i still prefer the ones in kopitiam la.lazy to brew myself.

  9. Thanks for the Laughter — as one Dr Michael Miller of the University Maryland advises:Doses of 15 minutees’ daily is equivalent to 15-30 minutes of wrokout at the Bukit Cahaya Seri Alam park! But drink lots of H+H+O afterwards. I still prefer my favourite cendol at the Seremban Lake Gardens to soya!

  10. To “reallybites”, Yess you get it. Proudly to announce that made in Melaka mate.

    Melaka hav a lot coffee maker but this is the famous one’lah. Visit their website http://www.aikcheong.com/ . Who wants it freshly… I can borong at their kilang…

  11. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

  12. Aiyer … sure ah Lil? I’ve been happily making buckets of soya bean for DH to drink ..aiyer .. LOL. Never mind ..since i have excess male hormones (PCOS maa..), he can have some of my female hormones .. ROTFLOL .. can wait to tell him this !!!

  13. aiyyaahh lilian, i luv soya bean milk. but still single so cannot comment on that ‘drive’ thing hehehe…

  14. OK, let me go buy more soy bean milk for myself, I drink it, eat it, bath with it, sleep on it, then I tell you got bigger or not.

  15. First phallic symbolism, then long long corridors. Now nippes??? hehehehehehe….

  16. Next time take picture of Jet Li-monk’s breast la!

  17. HAHAHAHHA!!! funny la u 5xmom!! hahahahhahahah
    btw..just being notti :

    if soya milk really makes breasts bigger, then those women who wan bigger breast no need 2 go for silicon implants la..so expensive..drink more soya milk…cheaper and more natural.kekeke

  18. WOW!! MORE SOYA MILK FOR MEE! 😛

  19. mana lilian sudah pergi?

  20. i dont like soya bean, thats y no big breast..hahaa..

    hey, 5xmom…tell ur ATM that u will squeeze soya milk for him loo, home made 1 marr..no need go buy cartons lar, outside soya milk not pekat n not fresh marr. after promised him, then delay delay dont make soya milk for him…hahaha…

  21. ptfff.. lies soya bean is the best drink god ever made! on other news, now i can wear my skinny jeans and my butt don’t look big in it.. 😀

  22. more like soya bean got preservative la.. drink liow will become fossil

  23. Keh,keh,keh, I very pandai now. Dunwan to comment and end up with more comments. I had been sitting here, looking at the funny comments.

    Now, I sendiri confused liao, dunno what to believe. LOL! So much for my theory. Thanks for all the comments.

  24. you dowan to reply, we lagi want to comment ak.

    No wonder why people call ‘eat tau-fo’ as ambil kesempatan. Rupa-rupanya, eat get the big breast.

  25. kehkehkeh, someone please write to Mango privately and give him some ‘education’?

  26. LMAO! LMAO LMAO!

  27. aik cheong coffee??!!

    love it – especially their kopi tarik ;))

  28. […] can’t help it. Long time ago, I wrote a humorous post ‘Soya and big breasts‘ that eating too much soy products can cause men to have breasts due to the high level of […]