Soya and big breasts

Life, Lies, Sex, Humor, Politics of a Malaysian blogger

The Obnoxious 5xmom

April 8th, 2005 at 1:36 am

Soya and big breasts

» by Lilian in: Family, Humor

*This is just joke I shared with my husband hor? There is nothing more to it, ok?*

You see, coffee is my life. And atm (husband) said I tarak taste-si (no standard) ‘cos I only drink Aik Cheong kopi-o. Of course he can perli me lar, ‘cos he drinks Made-In-Italy expresso with his Italian colleagues everyday. Brewed with imported machine and beans.
kopi

The thing is, never perli me or else I will take revenge till the ends of the world.

ONE DAY, AT THE HYPERMARKET
5xdad buying cartons of soyabean milk.
5xmom into nagging mode
5xmom : Aiyoh, why buy so many cartons? Damn heavy.
5xdad : Healthy drinks.
5xmom : Healthy your head. The internet says that soya beans contain a lot of progesterone, the female hormones. Drink liao hor, can become pondans. (effeminate)
5xdad : Goodlah, then I can earn extra income at Lorong Gharu. With you spending like water, I need that money.

(Lorong Gharu is Penang infamous pondans backlane. You can find pondans there, service charge cheap-cheap only.)

ANOTHER DAY, IN THE KITCHEN
5xmom : Aiyoh, this fridge so damn packed liao. All your soya-bean milk la.
*Repeat the same thing about soya bean got female hormone yadda, yadda.*
5xdad : (tiu-ed liao) You ever seen a monk with big breasts or not?
5xmom : LOL! How I know wor? I never un-robe a monk before.

Remember – never leave a woman with nothing else to say in an argumement. Always give them ladder to come down. Otherwise, she will plot and plot to get even.

So, 5xmom did a very bad thing tonite. She grabbed the poor happy monk at home and took a photo of his big breasts, just to prove to 5xdad.
nenen

YESTERDAY, IN THE BEDROOM
5xmom still not satisfied about losing out on the soya-bean issue.
While putting on the SKII….
5xmom : AHAHHH……now I know why! You drink somemore the soyabean milk lah, *yadda the same hormones issue* You will end up like the monks. You will have no more ‘drive’. That time, tongkat ali also kenot save you liao.

(Some background info in case my overseas readers (chewah, as if I got any) do not comprehend. Vegetarians (like the Buddist monks) eat mostly soy-based products. These monks are all celibate, meaning, they do not engage in sexual intercourse. Tongkat ali is a Malaysian plant purported to work like Viagra.)

*As I mentioned above, these are jokes I exchanged with my husband. Nothing religious involved hor?*

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28
  • narrowband
    3:05 am on April 8th, 2005 1

    OMG i must stay away from soya bean drinks already! But coffee contains caffein, not exactly very good for healthy either! Then, how? Buy Spritzer lah!

  • MrsT
    4:43 am on April 8th, 2005 2

    Hilirious lah you .. lilian.. :)

  • neeshen
    6:44 am on April 8th, 2005 3

    Tell your hubby aik cheong consider got class already. very fragrant. now we are using the sailor brand, not too long ago our coffee comes in kilos bought from the chinese shops.

  • JxT2J
    6:48 am on April 8th, 2005 4

    I really must stop drink soya bean drinks… and get my gf to drink more. WAHAHAHA.

  • 9T9
    9:00 am on April 8th, 2005 5

    How about soy sauce. Maybe this other soya bean product can make ur [Ehemm] become darker huh… Can’t imagine lor. Whoa, how that gal to eat just plain char kue teow.

  • autumnmusic
    9:59 am on April 8th, 2005 6

    reminds me of an email attachment i once received that detailed a woman’s experience with soya. thinking tat soya is v gd for health, she consumed it banyak-banyak since she was a teen, i think. then health problems started appearing despite doing regular exercise and maintaining a gd diet – lymph node got problem, and kena cancer also but still din realize the soya she drank was the culprit till too late.

  • kenjiro
    10:01 am on April 8th, 2005 7

    Hmm .. interesting, my brother like soya bean curd a lot. And he is getting ghayish lately … wonder if that has to do with it?
    Hehe

  • reallybites
    10:31 am on April 8th, 2005 8

    aik cheong? the one in malacca one rite?

    eh my dad loves it tooo.his office plp drinks aik cheong only.

    i still prefer the ones in kopitiam la.lazy to brew myself.

  • ylchong
    11:14 am on April 8th, 2005 9

    Thanks for the Laughter — as one Dr Michael Miller of the University Maryland advises:Doses of 15 minutees’ daily is equivalent to 15-30 minutes of wrokout at the Bukit Cahaya Seri Alam park! But drink lots of H+H+O afterwards. I still prefer my favourite cendol at the Seremban Lake Gardens to soya!

  • 9T9
    11:38 am on April 8th, 2005 10

    To “reallybites”, Yess you get it. Proudly to announce that made in Melaka mate.

    Melaka hav a lot coffee maker but this is the famous one’lah. Visit their website http://www.aikcheong.com/ . Who wants it freshly… I can borong at their kilang…

  • Silencers
    12:19 pm on April 8th, 2005 11

    Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

  • pompit
    1:00 pm on April 8th, 2005 12

    Aiyer … sure ah Lil? I’ve been happily making buckets of soya bean for DH to drink ..aiyer .. LOL. Never mind ..since i have excess male hormones (PCOS maa..), he can have some of my female hormones .. ROTFLOL .. can wait to tell him this !!!

  • sue
    1:58 pm on April 8th, 2005 13

    aiyyaahh lilian, i luv soya bean milk. but still single so cannot comment on that ‘drive’ thing hehehe…

  • twinsmom
    2:20 pm on April 8th, 2005 14

    OK, let me go buy more soy bean milk for myself, I drink it, eat it, bath with it, sleep on it, then I tell you got bigger or not.

  • sexymama
    2:53 pm on April 8th, 2005 15

    First phallic symbolism, then long long corridors. Now nippes??? hehehehehehe….

  • simon
    3:06 pm on April 8th, 2005 16

    Next time take picture of Jet Li-monk’s breast la!

  • Lobak
    4:48 pm on April 8th, 2005 17

    HAHAHAHHA!!! funny la u 5xmom!! hahahahhahahah
    btw..just being notti :

    if soya milk really makes breasts bigger, then those women who wan bigger breast no need 2 go for silicon implants la..so expensive..drink more soya milk…cheaper and more natural.kekeke

  • PeNNyPupZ
    5:32 pm on April 8th, 2005 18

    WOW!! MORE SOYA MILK FOR MEE! :P

  • twinsmom
    7:38 pm on April 8th, 2005 19

    mana lilian sudah pergi?

  • MMG
    7:41 pm on April 8th, 2005 20

    i dont like soya bean, thats y no big breast..hahaa..

    hey, 5xmom…tell ur ATM that u will squeeze soya milk for him loo, home made 1 marr..no need go buy cartons lar, outside soya milk not pekat n not fresh marr. after promised him, then delay delay dont make soya milk for him…hahaha…

  • Rodney
    8:55 pm on April 8th, 2005 21

    ptfff.. lies soya bean is the best drink god ever made! on other news, now i can wear my skinny jeans and my butt don’t look big in it.. :D

  • orang jahat
    9:14 pm on April 8th, 2005 22

    more like soya bean got preservative la.. drink liow will become fossil

  • lilian
    9:25 pm on April 8th, 2005 23

    Keh,keh,keh, I very pandai now. Dunwan to comment and end up with more comments. I had been sitting here, looking at the funny comments.

    Now, I sendiri confused liao, dunno what to believe. LOL! So much for my theory. Thanks for all the comments.

  • Mango Tan
    10:15 pm on April 8th, 2005 24

    you dowan to reply, we lagi want to comment ak.

    No wonder why people call ‘eat tau-fo’ as ambil kesempatan. Rupa-rupanya, eat get the big breast.

  • lilian
    10:39 pm on April 8th, 2005 25

    kehkehkeh, someone please write to Mango privately and give him some ‘education’?

  • Paul Tan
    12:48 pm on April 9th, 2005 26

    LMAO! LMAO LMAO!

  • des
    6:40 pm on May 13th, 2005 27

    aik cheong coffee??!!

    love it – especially their kopi tarik ;) )

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    7:23 pm on February 11th, 2008 28

    [...] can’t help it. Long time ago, I wrote a humorous post ‘Soya and big breasts‘ that eating too much soy products can cause men to have breasts due to the high level of [...]

 

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