Why Sexy-Turkeys get a week?

This is a spin-off from Simon’s blog, Like that also can ah? While greater, more noble professions like doctors, nurses, teachers and even greater vocations like fathers and mothers get only one miserable day to celebrate, sexy-turkeys aka secretaries get a whole week.

Certainly, you know that there is such a thing as Secretary’s Week, don’t you? Haven’t you heard that horrible voice of Annuar Zain talking about it over the radio? (Hey, how come his voice sounds so much better singing?)

Well, let me tell you a little secret. If you are interested to move way, way up high on the corporate ladder, you have to listen carefully. Unless of course, you can sleep your way up, then you may exit now.

If you are a secretary, please cheer me on. If you find what I am going to say appalling and a disgrace to my ex-profession, then, marm, you need to go back to secretary’s school again.

The term secretary does not necessary restricted to Confidential Secretary, Executive Secretary (like me la) but it can be that miserable looking twit who is an office-administrator, clerk, receptionist, RPCN, legal clerk or even telephone operator. These are women who work closely with the big boss of that particular kongsi gelap/tai yee long/companies/corporations/conglomerate whatever la.

Here are some power of the secretary:

– A secretary can make your life very miserable or make your job cushy. Treat her well.

– A secretary has the closest relationship with the big boss. No one gets closer in the office and the only other person is the wife at home. She is there when the big boss is angry, disappointed, jubilant, etc.

– When you screwed up real bad, the secretary has the capability to go and sooth the boss’s feathers, say a few nice words for you or kill you for eternity.

– She may be the person in the office without a specific job spec but the boss is paying good money for her ears and eyes and on her own accord, sometimes her mouth (to talk la!).

– She may remain a secretary all her working life with no promotions but don’t underestimate. Some secretaries have brought up their children, send them overseas, bought expensive cars, with the boss’s financial backing. And heck, the smart ones know that they do not even need to trade their bodies in exchange.

– A secretary is the one that is instrument in hooking up the big boss with the big shots in the industries and gomen. Do you think it is easy to pick up the phone and make a call for an appointment? No, man, it takes skill. Golf, booze, women is not enough. It takes two very talkative women with the same wave-length to get any multi-million ringgit deal through.

Like for e.g., a secretary has to know who favours what kind of chicks (without feathers wan) and remember when to send the freshest oysters (I mean the real ones from the sea)to a certain minister or book an all expenses paid holidays for so and so’s family.

So, does this explain why we need a whole seven days to celebrate Secretaries’ Week? Because each of the employees must do their part in making sure that they are not digging their own grave or chopping their (corporate) ladders. They have a week’s grace to treat the secretaries. Yeah, these secretaries are watching and keeping tab on who is naughty and who is nice.

Don’t play-play hor? Take this seriously. Send a bunch of flower, treat her to hi-tea, Annuar Zain, Anita Sarawak, the whole works! And yes, secretary who retired early turn into great blogger, you notice that?

14 Replies to “Why Sexy-Turkeys get a week?”

  1. Secretary’s week is not only celebrated by the secretary. My former boss take everyone out for makan during secretary’s week. So everyone also untung. Current job don’t have secretary, we have admin people, but somehow its just not celebrated in the company. maybe quietly got, i wont know lar.

  2. Heh, yes, what you said is true. I’m appalled at the power my mom wields in the office, cos not only is she an executive secretary (like you), she’s been there for 25 years liao.

    Offend her and the engineers will all kena kau kau. 🙂

  3. “It takes two very talkative women with the same wave-length to get any multi-million ringgit deal through.”

    That pretty much hit the nail squarely on the spot 🙂

  4. SExytary week is an excuse for u to date ur sexytary out, just the 2 of us … ops! i mean just the 2 of you guys LOL!!

  5. Bravo..!! bravo..!! and bravo again..!!! well said.. !! and all the truth.. !! ppl out there.. believe it.. it’s the truth..!! every single thing that lilian has written..!! and bravo again..lilian..!!!!

  6. The work of a secretary is already quite simple, now they are giving them 1 week holiday. Cannot believe it. By the way, most of the secretaries i met are evil in some sense, its very true that they have the closest relation with the boss.

    Ah, if you are the pretty and sexy kind, the company will pay you even higher.

  7. Hey, tt’s all too true… really been n’joying your tongue-in-cheek-with-more-than-a-hint-of-truth blog 5xmom… can see tt you’ve had your fair share of fun being the ’empress dowager’ aka ‘guardian angel to the boss’ aka ‘the woman behind the boss’… can’t say you dun have more than a lil deviousness inside, not after years of honing your skills buttering up, telling white lies, bribing, etc etc… keep it up 5xmom… you shld syndicate your writing…

    Hmmm, maybe you might wanna blog abt being a mum to an all-boys family. Don’t you wish you have a daughter whom you can share girly secrets with sometimes?

    Signing off,
    A Singaporean in Illinois…

  8. Hahaha!!

    *clap clap clap*

    Brilliant take on secretaries, Lilian!! Brilliant!

    Hmm.. as a woman, would it be better for me to have a male one or a female one? 🙂

  9. Secretaries – I just love them. they are fun to talk to and really, can help a lot. Without them, well, life would be miserable for a boss. Hey – I cherrish one myself. My wife was a secretary, before we moved to Indonesia.

    and you know the best? Most secretaries look way better than their bosses. No wonder I like to hang out around them (just kidding!)

  10. Mmm … I never did manage to convince my secretary to go celebrate Secretary Week or Day for that matter. Not sure whether that implies I have a very good very hard-working secretary or otherwise. 😉
    regards, sabre23t =^.^=

  11. Lol, that explains why my boss’s secretary always come in with a smile eveeryday! [back when i was working part time]. *applause applause*

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