Blogging is to disseminate information to people. So, I am blogging today.
Topic : How to pick up vomit.
Vomits usually consists of:
1) milk, banana and rice in goey texture
2) milk and goey goo
3) gallons of beer
4) fermented durians with cincalok
5) belacans with petai
and insert your own food here
…. …. …. ….
So, listen here folks, this is to educate people, wukay? So listen carefully (or read la) and make sure you don’t blink your eyes.
Go to kitchen and take kitchen towel
Take one roll, a new one, preferably
Come back to vomit spot
Tear many many pieces of kitchen towel and spread on TOP of vomit.
Leave it there to soak and diffuse.
Take care of the vomit victim. I.e. the person that kena the vomit la wei, not the vomitor. Whether needs to change clothes, bath or whatever.
Then, deal with the vomitor. If vomitor is above 18 years old, scream – You idiot! Next time, go to the toilet and vomit. You go die lah.
If below 18 months old, kiss, kiss and sayang sayang and coo coo.
If in between 18 mths old and 18 years old – Yell – Serve you right. Told you not to eat the whole comb of bananas and drink that quart of milk. See lah, now my sofa is dirty. **Insert your own dialect cuss words.**
And that, ladies and gentlemen is a blog to inform and educate people. Thank you for reading. Terima kasih. Vannakam. Xie xie. Kam siah.
Oh ya, forget about the vomit and kitchen towel. Call the dog to eat them. Or leave it there to dry and use it to build fire in case Tenaga tarak karen, which is often.