I got constipation

Serious. I usually never get constipation even when I stuff myself with lots of chocolates. But recently, I changed my eating habit to drink a lot of water, eat fibrous food, lots of vegetables and I got constipated!

*sheesh* I think my body is acting stubborn and defiant. I have been faithfully exercising for about 45 minutes each day. This morning, when I stepped on the weighing scale…….4 pounds. I PILE ON 4 farking pounds. MCB! Someone give me a hammer to whack that scale. No, that idiotic scale ought to be send to the junkyard and flattened like those smashed up cars.

On the blogging part, I have three posts that I had written but decided not to publish it. Some people are just not worth my time. Let them rot.

I just read about another earthquake near Pakistan. What caught my eyes :

The situation was still tense, witnesses said, with residents listening and watching the crows whose screeching served as a early warning system before each tremor.

Well, lots of people died. Some of the villages are completely flattened. May they find strength in Allah.

And their PM said,

President Musharraf went the scene in Islamabad where scores of people were feared killed or trapped in two 12-storey apartment blocks reduced to rubble.

It is a test for all of us. It is a test for me, of the Prime Minister, of the government and of the entire nation and I am sure we will succeed,” Musharraf said.

And I want to say – God doesn’t test people. These are all shits that we cannot avoid on earth. It is not God who did this to us, for God’s sake! I know, the PM did not say anything about God. But that other President uses God’s name. God’s ear must be itchy.

I simply hate it when people tells me when my son died that it is a test from God. For God’s sake, I may not know God then but I know Him enough to know that if we are to live on earth, all shits are inevitable. But God is always there if we just turn to Him. Yeah, God is the reliable guy who will help us out of deep shits.

Then again, I know of one crazy lady who told me that when she got constipation, she will pray! Puhleez! God gave you an anus and the desire to push, so for goodness sake, just push that shit out and don’t bother God. He has better things to do, ok?

One more thing – Over the weekend, I am taking off some links and putting up new ones. If you like your blog to be linked, just drop your URL here, ok? I like to build long, long links.

Heh, I bet no one knows what to comment with these constipated postings.

22 Replies to “I got constipation”

  1. doc – testing what? Oh…testing your PSP issit? I kasi you test, you must pimp my URL on your site one wor.

    Big BoK – Don’t you just hate it? I stepped up full of confidence and poof! got a shock instead.

  2. you’re right I don’t know what to say about your constipated issue…cuz seriously aren’t fibrous food meant to prevent constipation??

    As for your “god is testing us” part…well I strongly disagree with you but ehehe…me not gonna argue about it over here 🙂 Everyone is entitled to their own thoughts 🙂

  3. Lilian,

    45mins? It is possible that your body is building up muscle. You could look much much slimmer but have the same weight if you build up your muscle tone.

    Is God testing us? Yep, I agree with you. There is a difference between God making something happen and God allowing something to happen.

  4. AM not a doctor but know enough to see that diet wise you are doing right but there may be other reasons:
    # Lack of exercise.
    # Certain Medications.
    # Irritable bowel syndrome.
    # Changes in life or routine.
    # Abuse of laxatives.
    # Ignoring the urge to have a bowel movement.

  5. well you r right i don’t hv anything to say about your constipation except don’t leave skid marks on your toilet bowl! But seriously i THANK YOU for pimping my blog here, TERIMA KASIH BANYAK BANYAK KAK LILIAN!

  6. hey lilian.. when you first start exercising you DO gain some weight before you actually lose them.. bone density, muscles bla bla.. that sorta thing.. but keep it up!

    constipation? try taking kiwifruits.. but with the skin on! yes furry tho they are.. they work! at least for most people.. cuz my aunt gives them to her patients and they work.. or..eat more yummy jagung!

  7. Pang sai beh chut, very seldom for me… but pang seo cheh sai, sometimes. Hate it when I have to hunt for the nearest public loo. Most of the time I rush back to my own sanctuary (home) and spend some quality time in there. Otherwise, I nggggggggggkkkkkkk (tahan).

    Yes, seems like I oso got nothing to say about constipation :p Went on to say about lau sai pulak~

  8. narrowband – Hahaha, quality time! LOL, there is not place like our home toilet hor?

    jean – Yeah, that’s what I hope also. Building up muscles. Kiwi fruit with skin? Ewws..what if I poop out a furry monster instead!

    Wu Ching – Skid marks? Is that what you call that? Haha. I am learning each day.

    Adam – None of the above, definitely! I cuma makan terlalu banyak kurma, I think. And not enuff water.

    ah pek – Actually hor, banana can cause constipation you know? If you got lau sai, eat banana with rice and gerenti to bind up the sai. Many babies got constipated because the moms fed them banana to pangsai but got the opposite effect.

    mulut celupar – You know who is the real shit here? You are.

    helen – Yeah, I know what you mean. Sometimes, people got the message wrong and they would point fingers at God. It is all wrong that way. Whatever has to happen, has to happen and with God, we could pull through, right?

    centerpide – I believe in the big picture where we accept and surrender to God and yet, use our God’s given guidance to fight through. Well, it is going to be a long entry to explain. Next time, maybe. 🙂

  9. i have slow metabolic rate. so my only solution is drinking green tea. if that doesnt work for u, try the Diet Green Tea, that should work as it will surely regulate u. hope this works.

    noone can stop God’s will. but we either accept it or we dont right?

    if u want to link my blog, i am at http://elysplace.blogspot.com

  10. Mum, have u tried the water theraphy. Dats like drinking 1.5 litre of water every morning before you even do ur usual stuffs. Not in one gulp but over a period of like 10 – 15 minutes. I used to have constipation problem but after the theraphy…..well…. i’m ok now. Do try it and relax on the fibre diet. Too much is not good too. Too heaty as we said in Malaysia.

  11. BD charcoal + Prune joice 1 bottle=rushin mad to toilet
    if not add more water
    and whack laxatives like mad
    owning mad i tell u
    i mean shitting mad…heehhe

  12. well… God will help those who help themselves… as for the President fella… how dare he invokes God’s name for the sake of his political survival!!

  13. hi auntie lilian, i’ve been visiting your bloggie regularly since stumbling upon it a couple weeks back. I usually have fun just reading your posties and some of the replies. Today read u have constipation prob. And its a horrible feeling, i know. I think i have the solution for ya. So tot i’d post a reply. Used to have the same problem too. Its normal to be constipated after changing your diet to fruits and vege at the beginning. (do a search – Recovery Symptoms/Healing Crisis) You should continue with more fruits especially in the morning. (try JUICING 4carrots + 1green apple or EATING watermelons) One chinese doc told me, for women, if we don’t have “strength” kennot push the nggngg out.So we should have food that gives us energy. Am using this fiber from Singapore company. Check it out yourself. It helps u pangsai normally, no lausai, no por tor tia, works really well, feels natural and the taste is lemony (the fiber not the sai – hehehe)
    http://www.myhunza.com ( Hunza fiber plus formula )
    Hope this helps!

  14. For me if i have constipation, i’ll drink a huge glass of cold milk in the morning. Then proceed to eat one babana. Must drink milk first. Otherwise can get gastric.

    Oh did you know eating onions&ginger can help ‘release’ wind from the body(*farts*)…unrelated but well hehe :p

    lin me, lin me!

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