I got a little kpc today and thumbed through some women mags at the mamak stall. Almost every one of those magazines catering for older women have titles like,
“My toy boy husband cheated all my money.”
“My husband’s mistress yadda yadda yadda.”
It is all about unrequited love. A typical problem in most relationships.
I snapped this pic when I was in Perhentian. The photo was taken at Pantai Cahaya Bulan in Kota Bahru, Kelantan (or Pantai Cinta Berahi, Beach of Passionate Love). Aren’t this pak cik and mak cik so contented and fulfiled? *sigh*
Sometimes, some women short sell themselves and got cheated. Sometimes, some women expected too much. Sometimes, I feel like taking a dead fish and slap some women for putting their husbands too high on the pedestal. Sometimes, I feel like shaking some women silly for not appreciating their husbands.
I know, I know. These are none of my business. Of course, usually I never meddle but still, I can afford to think and put my thoughts down on my blog, right?
Look at this mat salleh couple. They were so happy just walking on the beach. They held hands and walk and walk and walk. Who cares about dirty beaches? They have each other. (Sorry hor, my photos and my stories aren’t related.)
I took a look at my sidebar and realised that very soon, I am going to be married to the same man (of course same man la) for 17 years. I knew him for 20 LONG YEARS. Which means, I had lived part of my life with him.
I must say that it is not easy to stay married to the same man (aiks, there I go again) for 17 LONG YEARS. Oh no. If you read what the researchers said, couples whom have critically ill children and bereaved parents have VERY high percentage of divorcing. Well, I can attest to the fact that lengthy critical illness and death of a child certainly put our marriage (and all the other bereaved parents I know) to the most stringent test. I survived, thank God.
And I really find it hard to understand why some couples call it quits at the very first sign of a crack in the relationship. Re-married and divorced couples, no offence please. I do try to understand but sometimes, when I see those children who appeared all lost and disorientated, I do wish to find a solution for them.
One of the thing that I told those parents who are having difficulties in their relationships when their children are critically ill or recently passed away is :
“All you need is to go back and sleep on the same bed. You can always keep to your side and he to his side. With time, hopefully, those feelings will be sorted out. Don’t ever do anything drastic because your life is already so bad, so don’t make it worse. What’s so difficult about sleeping on a same bed?”
Thank God, my crude suggestion did work on two couples. Eventually, the wife learns to expect less from the husband and the husband eventually, realise that all the wife expects is some show of feelings on his side.
How nice if every couple gets to sail into the sunset together. I believe it can be done, with God’s grace. If the relationship is not going right, turn to God.
I uploaded this pic and is meant to dedicate to Mr. and Mrs. B. They just celebrated their 7th wedding anniversary. Happy anniversary and God bless!
So, it concludes ‘Marry, grow old, die together’.
P/S : Divorced and re-married people, please, please don’t take offence with my thoughts, ok? I know it takes a lot more than that to make a marriage works. Sometimes, things just don’t work out. I kena flamed before for writing about staying married, now I am so, so paranoid. Bite fingers and pray did not kena again.