I either need a personal cameraman or a new husband

egg

Personally, in my very humble opinion, I think I am an above average photographer. Even eggs can look attractive when I am behind the camera. These six eggs got photographed from all angles, with different lightings, composition and got adjusted to ‘sit’ properly.

But when it comes to self-potrait, I cannot compose my own photo. I bought a damn expensive photography magazine yesterday. It costs me almost RM30. Bought it from Borders. My DSLR camera has pre-programme settings for potrait photography. It is just ‘thiak’. But arrggh…after arranging all the sofa, cushion, table lamps, vases and I zoom/focus/set aperture/shutter speed yadda yadda, I call my sons and man to click for me. I even put water on my hair to get the ‘erotica’ shot (new technique I learnt). But the photo turned out like I had just stepped out of the rain after a long sleep. Arrggh…

Why oh why are husbands so hopeless in taking photos of the wives? They can spend minutes and hours to get nice baby photos. They can crouch down on the damp grass to take dead leaves photos. But ask them to take wives’ photos, they just simply hantam. Click before you can even say che(ese).

No matter how many times I reminded him – Check carefully hor, right angle or not? Is the vase in the frame? Are my hair brown? Don’t apply flash. Adjust the white balance. Make the photo looks warm….bla bla bla. And yet, it turned out like a blob of Jabba.

So, conclusion. Take photos of the mirror.

potrait

Or ask my 9 years old son to take my photo.

car
(Photo taken by my 9 years old kid. I love the loving pose with my toddler.)

That way, I don’t get photos with me opening my mouth wide or hand pointing somewhere or cock-eyed or have a constipated look or looks simply Rosie of Phua Chu Kang. If Helen has not lamented about this (can’t find the permalink, Helen) and have lots of wives complaining about the same thing, I would have thought that my dear hubby purposely take bad photos of me. So, now I know. Husbands are the worst photographers. Find a professional cameraman if you want to see good photos of yourself.

31 Replies to “I either need a personal cameraman or a new husband”

  1. That’s becoz he don’t want the whole world to “chase after” his wifey if he takes a fantastic pix of her. I like the 9 yr old’s shot of you – very happy and casual.

  2. 9394 – Yes! that’s me alright. And I also remember vaguely the one queing behind me!

    boo – I don’t think so but I do wish so. hahaha

  3. Mine…. ADOI!! Sakit kepala. Half of his shots blur one. He’d argue that they look clear on the camera’s lcd screen. But me, one eye see also can tell it’s blur b4 i transfer to pc, sigh. But he can take pic one, only our camera’s auto focus takes damn long until his hands also shake ledi, hehehehehehe. Must get a new camera, then no more headaches.

  4. when i was pregged, my hub took fairly good pictures of me. Now that i’m no longer, every picture he takes, i look like some old fat haggard woman. Ok..mebbe I shud wake up n smell the coffee and accept reality. SOB!

  5. mott – I think maybe blaming him is easier to digest. LOL! He is too busy with other subjects (like the baby) so no patience to snap pics of the wifey.

    Lin Peh – Mine or whose? Mine must use microscope la.

    Darthvadai – I like the name! The boy in the pic is only 2+ yrs, the cameraman is 9 yrs. 🙂

    Samm – Yeah, don’t forget to take lots of pics your pregger state. I never took photo ‘cos my nose was extra bulbous! LOL.

  6. It seemed that you are a near professional photographer. Hey, not all husbands are the so-hopeless, shame photographers, they are just opting for natural & lifelike shots rather than costume shots. As you can imagine, nice baby photos are sometimes so natural and pure leh!
    I like to take my wife’s photo but she used to shake her hand and says: “mei lah, lau liau ko hip ha me.”??

  7. you are so right! Husbands are the worst photographers! My husband dropped my new camera 4 times, some more wanna ask, why the camera acts crazy!!

  8. 5xmom, Sunshine takes nice pics of me. He is so obsessed with taking pictures til I am so fed-up. The recent trip in Bangkok, I was posing at each and every corner for him to take picture. Since only two of us went, he took tripod also, so that he could be in the pictures as no friends to help us. I guess it all depends lor, if your hubby is interested in photography, then I guess he would take the time to adjust the settings and all to make sure the pics turn out nice.

  9. I was in KLCC tday and thinking whether I will bump into you! By the way, I know you love chocolates – try the Royce chocolates opposite Sun Moulin, near the Isetan Supermkt. Very nice stuff – my fav were the almond chocolates. They allow you to test the chocs as most of them are pre-packed.

  10. I have to agree with u that some ppl really dun have the artistic touch. They will just take up the cam, and click, that’s all. Won’t even move around or zoom in/out. So sad! i really understand how u feel! hahaha gik sei yan!

  11. must compliment u abit…u r on ur way to be pro. Nice pic of eggs – i like the shot.

    Making a mental note in my head – criteria for my future husband(if) – must know how to take nice pic of me in watever situations esp after 20 years of marriage.

  12. Hello,
    Nice eggs (in the picture)! I love taking pictures too but not as professional as you. You take very good pictures I have to say.

    Always wanted to get an SLR but too heavy and lazy to bring around with me. I have a Ixus50 and only starting to learn. Usually, won’t be able to find me in the picture as I am the one behind it. My husband cannot help me take nice picture of my own potrait, he just can’t get the angle I wanted. so sometimes I have play around and use timer for my self potrait.

  13. lilian,

    If you want a second hubby I’m available.. I can take good photos.. 😉

    btw.. have a look at a few photos i took in my blogsite.Just took it a few days ago..

  14. hubby is the worst photographer and lagi teruk is….. HE thinks he is the BEST!! Aiyoh…
    Suppose to focus on me, but I have to squint my eyes to see where I am!!

    Better get another cameraman to service you….

  15. hahaha so are all husbands the same??? i guess so… i hardly have much shots of myself and boiboi but plenty of him wid boiboi… so so nice and sweet ones. james, if u r reading this… now u know why no pics of myself kakakaka

  16. speaking from a hubby’s point of view.

    “@#$% why must always ask me take photo. think you somemore got so pretty like before meh? so gian take photo go take yourselflah!”

    of course cannot say out loud lah. never die before meh.

  17. Eh.

    Pic turn out good, means the model is chio la.

    Pic turn out bad, means photographer fault lo?

    :p Muehehe, but that happens… lol.

    U attending some wedding in Cyberjaya? MMU Cyberjaya got alot of PPS bloggers wan wor… ;p

  18. Damn, no chance of seeing the wet, come-on look photo you mentioned hor? lol

    I agree with you about husbands being the worst photographer. You know, I remember once I asked my hubby to take my photo and try to get the best angle to make me slimmer. After about 10 mins, I went to see my pic, and I got the shock of my life. My hubby, making sure my body is slim, forgo my body altogether!! The photo? Just my face covering 90% of the whole pic!! lol

  19. Agree agree always had the same problem to the point that I only get a photo of myself like once every few months, max about 10 a year and that even not all good, cannot harap one unless the other person also a photographer. Hehe tried taking in mirror as well but eyes always screwed up trying to view the camera viewer as well as ahead.

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