Last night at 2 freaking am in the morning, I was asssigned to cook another batch of 100 sausages for charity sale. It involves boiling the sausages, pan fry them in batches with Worcestershire sauce and then, cooking the sauce and roll the dogs in the red sauce.
And guess what happened? The gas died on me. WHAT THE EFF? 2AM, fifty more sausages to fry and sauce to cook and NO BLARDY GAS. ~cold sweats~ Never mind, I am very resilient. I won’t let my kid down and I certainly will not give his schoolmates food poisoning. So, I had to cook the sausages in small batches with the microwave oven. Grill, microwave, grill + microwave, grill again.
I had four minutes interval in between those sessions. So, my itchy butt decided to de-seed the dried chillies. Mind you, this is the first time I did it. HELL! DRIED CHILLIES ARE HOTTER THAN HELL. My face started to sting. I wasn’t aware earlier and scratch my neck. Hot. My contact lenses started to burn. My ears also can feel the heat.
Never mind. I am very resilient. Took out two small plastic bags and used them as gloves. What a chore because I am running between the microwave oven at every four minutes interval.
I either get tiu-ed and throw everything away or I continue and finish my tasks. So, I choose the latter. And there….I imagine what will happen if I scratch elsewhere…..Ooooh…burning cheebye. I managed to amuse myself with all the funny thoughts. All alone at 3 am in the morning, with 100 sausages and 100 grams dried chillies.
Like what will happen to chilli sausages? Do they shrivel or do they explode?
And how do those women who went for those silly chilli slimming courses survive? Aren’t their butts, bellies and thighs gonna burn from the chilli wrap? Wouldn’t their cheebyes burn too? I wonder…
Anyway, I finished cooking all the sausages and swear never try to be smart and buy dried chillies again.
Wait, I am not finished yet.
Before bed time, I had to take out my contact lenses. Shit, my eyes sting! Went to sleep and thought that that’s the end of the story. But no……
Woke up this morning……
my kid has his usual ‘ngg-ngg’. He must be washed, no compromise. I forgot all about my chili hot hands.
Okay, bottom washed.
then, I had to shower. Ok, done.
then, I had to put on my contact lenses. Oh my heavens! My eyes sting again and I realised that my hands are still smarting from the hot chilies when contact with water.
toddler came out of shower and tell me, Mommy, my neow-neow pain-pain lor.
and mommy also realised…… (don’t dare imagine).
26 thoughts on “CheeleeCheeBye and Murphy’s Law”
waaa…auntie, so late at night your imagination runs wild hor? LOL
LOL…wah, rolling on the floor laughing. I heard if you wash your hands with lotsa salt after handling chilli, it’ll help get rid of the ‘heat’.
Also hor, my mom usually just cut the dried chilli up in pieces and boil them in water…then use strainer with big holes and VOILA, all the seeds down the drain. You can perhaps give that a try
wahahahahaha!!!!!! you so loaded, why didn’t you pay somebody to do it??
Oh my..!! poor matthew..!!
I nearly fell off my chair laughing… your poor boy!! LOL Hope he is feeling better!!
BTW…. you did not touch your hubby anywhere hor??
hahaha soak his neow neow is ice water and watch it hardened lol!!! 1st erection!!!
OMG 1 thing after another, ur on FIRE!
adoi!! kesian the kecik…..wei, i tried that chilly slimming cream lar….wahlahwei….!!! damn blardy hot leh….n so stinging wor!!! i use tice n now it’s nicely sitting in my bathroom cabinet – collecting dust.
wah lau eh…
should have take 2 plastic bag act as sarong then only wash him
Siu sei yan lorrrr…… ku ku hot hot, kakakakakak. Thank god i dun cook, chillies, run away fast fast
chilli + water = burn hot
burn hot + touching everywhere = sting hot
what about Murphy’s Law?
auntie, wishing you and your family,
KIONG HEE HUAT DUA CAI!
ah pek – Kamsiah lu. Kiong Hee, kiong hee.
chim chim – Everything has gone wrong, that’s why. At the worst possible time.
samm – Aiyoh, everyone missed the other part hor? Nvm, I will blog more later.
zberjnak – That’s why lor, woke up early morning, forget liao.
Yvy – I heard from people too, that Cosway one works.
wu ching – yeah, you are ~so right~
wingz – mana boleh, shrink one la. Or you try before leh?
helen – you just gave me an idea for another post. Nope, he was sleeping when I go to bed and I was snoring when he went to work. Or else…LOL
mamaboK – Hahaha, lucky it wasn’t bad, just mild one which he did not notice after that
ah pek – I do everything myself lor, that’s why I so loaded. Sendiri bikin cookies, curries, chili paste, save money mah.
Su Sien – Tks for the tips. I boiled the chilis and put them in my steamer to drain the seeds. Now, I got nice chili paste with no seeds!
Cocka Doodle – A matter of survival mah. If not, I sure dump everything into the dustbin and leave a note for my son, Nah, take this RM50 go and donate and forget about any sausages. Must show the fighting spirit, right? Hahaha.
My goodness! 3am in the morning and you were with 100 chilli sausages!!!
The next day…
Son : *count count count* “There are only 99…”
Lilian : “Err… I got bored…”
doc- I actually ate two. One is not enough.
I think what doc meant was where you shoved the other one. ROFLMAO
I veli innocent mah, kenot get doc’s meaning. Hor?
Yalor… I also veli innocent one. So, you had two together or one by one? 😛
so young got training olidi..lol
hahaha aunty lilian know her equipment better than wingz. apa nii wingz? malu a bit..
WAHAAHHA… not only did you get one hot toddler..You’re one HOT mama too…HAHAHAHA …solly for laughing …
wulloweh! ouch ouch ouch for ur toddler!
this is so 5x.. i would not have this happening..
Happy Chinese New year.
that’s the one i bought lar. like wanna mati only lar. SO HOT!!
my house always has two tanks of gas, my mum cooks a lot.. one spare tank. always comes in handy..
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