Last night at 2 freaking am in the morning, I was asssigned to cook another batch of 100 sausages for charity sale. It involves boiling the sausages, pan fry them in batches with Worcestershire sauce and then, cooking the sauce and roll the dogs in the red sauce.
And guess what happened? The gas died on me. WHAT THE EFF? 2AM, fifty more sausages to fry and sauce to cook and NO BLARDY GAS. ~cold sweats~ Never mind, I am very resilient. I won’t let my kid down and I certainly will not give his schoolmates food poisoning. So, I had to cook the sausages in small batches with the microwave oven. Grill, microwave, grill + microwave, grill again.
I had four minutes interval in between those sessions. So, my itchy butt decided to de-seed the dried chillies. Mind you, this is the first time I did it. HELL! DRIED CHILLIES ARE HOTTER THAN HELL. My face started to sting. I wasn’t aware earlier and scratch my neck. Hot. My contact lenses started to burn. My ears also can feel the heat.
Never mind. I am very resilient. Took out two small plastic bags and used them as gloves. What a chore because I am running between the microwave oven at every four minutes interval.
I either get tiu-ed and throw everything away or I continue and finish my tasks. So, I choose the latter. And there….I imagine what will happen if I scratch elsewhere…..Ooooh…burning cheebye. I managed to amuse myself with all the funny thoughts. All alone at 3 am in the morning, with 100 sausages and 100 grams dried chillies.
Like what will happen to chilli sausages? Do they shrivel or do they explode?
And how do those women who went for those silly chilli slimming courses survive? Aren’t their butts, bellies and thighs gonna burn from the chilli wrap? Wouldn’t their cheebyes burn too? I wonder…
Anyway, I finished cooking all the sausages and swear never try to be smart and buy dried chillies again.
Wait, I am not finished yet.
Before bed time, I had to take out my contact lenses. Shit, my eyes sting! Went to sleep and thought that that’s the end of the story. But no……
Woke up this morning……
my kid has his usual ‘ngg-ngg’. He must be washed, no compromise. I forgot all about my chili hot hands.
Okay, bottom washed.
then, I had to shower. Ok, done.
then, I had to put on my contact lenses. Oh my heavens! My eyes sting again and I realised that my hands are still smarting from the hot chilies when contact with water.
toddler came out of shower and tell me, Mommy, my neow-neow pain-pain lor.
and mommy also realised…… (don’t dare imagine).