Si kau bo (bitch)

old_building

Having been bored out of my head, I cajoled atm to drive me to the place where our Penang state government is going to hold the Chinese New Year open house this Saturday. I suppose the enclave must be ready for this big event where our Prime Minister is coming to build bridges. They call it the Chinatown ‘cos the area has all the Chinese immigrants roots.

So, there I was, taking photos of everything. The place is rather deserted except for old men chatting outside their houses, children playing on the roads and few tourists traipsing along the Heritage Trial.

temple

Soon, I lost my atm ‘cos I was moving faster than him as he had to carry my toddler. I went into this little, narrow gate which leads to the Cheah kongsi. (for the Cheah clans. Any Cheah here? Put up your hand.)

lane

No, this is not a photoblog. I am just leading you guys to my blog posting. Si kau bo means bitch in Hokkien. So, are you curious yet?

So, the narrow lane leads to this magnificent, opulent, intrinsically decorated building. I snap here, snap there. No door gods missed my camera shot. All the tiles, roofs and grass also kena shot by my kick-ass DSLR camera.

And I was about to go out of the same narrow lane…..

And this stupid bitch came barking at me from out of nowhere. Okay, I did not notice if the animal has testicles hanging from its groins or eight tits dangling from the body. Just like to call it a bitch.

KNNMCB, this is a tourist spot, tiu. This is part of the Penang Heritage Trial. Internationally known and very femes. Si kau bo looks like a bull mastiff, with its fangs glaring at me and it went grrrrrrowwwlll and the eyes sparkling and the legs terkangkang (spread open) likedat. (hmmm…sort of remind me of some the people I know)

Lucky me that I greeted the temple caretaker earlier, an old man who was sweeping the floor. He told me the stupid dog doesn’t bite. But that dog is not his but belong to the house next door. So how to trust his words?

I walked. And the stupid bitch followed me. I turned around and stared at it and I stood still. Equally, mengkangkang my legs a bit like a cowboy. Holding my camera. Do you know that at that very moment, I did thought of flashing my camera flash light at that stupid animal to blind it?

That si kau bo did scare a bit and ran back a few steps. Then, I turned to walk and it started to follow me again, growwwling. Ahpek holding his lidi broom started to come after the cilaka animal but CCB dog refused to back down.

I make a few more steps and turned and stare at the dog again. And you know what? I remembered one of my commentors told me never to stare at an animal in the eyes. Can you believe me? At that saat-saat genting (tense moments) I can remember what my blog commentors wrote?

So, I look at it’s nose! It back up again and phew….by then, Ahpek swat his broom and that bitch ran back with it’s tail between the legs.

Moral of the story : Never run and show your fear when you face with si kau bo like these. Sometimes, si kau bo doesn’t come with four legs and a tail. Sometimes, they are your anal-retentive, sexually depraved, expired, past ‘sell-by date’ colleagues, sometimes they are your ‘I-did-not-negotiate-for’ relatives whom you acquired when you say ‘I do’. Or big bullies in college or school. Stay put, show that you are fearless and one person has to back down. Don’t let that person be you. Because if you run, you will get torn apart.

I am not bluffing about being chased by a dog, ok? This is not a shadowless kick, double edge-sword post, ok? So, don’t ask me whom I am shadow-kicking hor.

Cilaka, people say that those born of the dragon year ought to beware of dogs on dogs year. Last time, my niece (dragon) was bitten by her family dog on a dog year when she was 12 years old. Of course, I don’t believe all those mumbo-jumbo la. But still, I hate dogs. Stupid dogs.

Whee! We are driving up north tomorrow early morning for some photo opportunity. Green, vast paddy fields. Caves, waterfalls, jungle……

16 Replies to “Si kau bo (bitch)”

  1. OK, 2 years ago, I was cycling happily, and a dog chased after me. From nowhere at the junction, I was banged down by a motorcyclist and fractured my knee. Fortunately, it recovered 3 weeks later after a “singse sifu” urut urut. Hehe…

    From that onwards, I stared at dogs eyes whenever they want to attack me. Once, 2 Rotwellers (how to spell ah?) from front and back wanted to attack me. Luckily, a motorbike rode over and the rotwellers went after the motorcyclist.

    I was once banged down by the motorcyclist, and once saved by another motorcyclist. Hehe…

  2. Kiasi – Hohoho, you must hide that dragon horns and scales a bit so the dogs dunno you are a dragon lor. Wear some sheep clothings or something.

  3. Yep, it’s important not to run or fret when you are confronted by a dog. In fact, dogs can smell our fears.
    Because dogs, like any other animals are ‘territorial’ you need to face the dog and back off slowly. They will acknowledge that you are not confrontational.
    Rottweliers are very dangerous dogs and their jaw-grip are known to be fatal. If you are bitten by one, go for their eyes.
    A colleague of mine once kept such dogs also taught me another trick if you see someone being attacked by a rottweiler. Roll up some newspaper, light it and thrust the flames into the dog’s face.

  4. barking dogs dont bite kot. As they say, Tiam Kau Kar Si Lang, Luan Kau Beh Kar Lang.

    Ahpek is cute. U huat tart liao lar this year.

    All da best

  5. wahh…you remembered what I said in the midst of of danger? Keng chau!

    Oh yeah, spraying water at the dog works. But if you don’t have water, you can try romantic’s suggestion: GROWL back at them (although I can’t gurantee it’ll work all the time!)

  6. lilian – before i forget, this sunday got blogger’s CNY get-together at ong’s place near pragin. all invited. it’s a pot lucky thingy so hope to see u there!! 😀

  7. You must stare on the dog and give it an evil grin with a drooling face of cooking 3 cup(samshu, vineger, soya sauce) dog. It is called the smiling tiger tricks. 😉

  8. Ermm… is Auntie Ririan KauPeh about KauBo?
    One of my rellies used to bark back at dogs, but he was a big guy. Size+noise = dogs away?

  9. Dogs are often misunderstood. Take some time to understand them and you won’t have any problems.

    You were at it’s territory. The dog was only trying to protect it’s spot. Think of it the other way round. How would you react if a camera toting dog were to barge into your home and start taking snapshots? (No offense intended)

    When a dog tries to get too close. Raise both your hands and growl showing your teeth. You don’t know dog language and the best way to communicate is by body language. But like you said … show no fear or else you’ll get hell.

    Gong Xi Fa Cai!!!!

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