Disclaimer : Before you proceed, you must agree that I am not taking a jibe at any faiths/philosophy, not even Ayah Pin’s one. You must also know that nowadays, there is such thing call photoshop where people can alter your photos. Agree? Now, proceed.
I had accomplished seven days. Marvellous! Bravo! Syabas! Keong Hee! I even cook Indian food just to tide over the cravings.
Actually, I learn something from going vegetarian. Just to let you know, I am an lacto-ovo-vegetarian, meaning that I drink milk from the cow tits (though of course I don’t really drink milk) and eat the eggs from the chicken butt. However, I don’t eat anything from the sea nor land nor air. And no, I am not doing this for religious purpose but if I can finish 40 days, I will probably go tell Jesus that I had been a good girl who managed to resist the temptations.
You know, when I was young, my family never go on any fast or follow much rituals. So, I always, always bugged my mom why people want to eat vegetarian foods and yet, disguised them as animal parts. Mom always told me to shut up.
These past seven days, I had to find things to stuff myself. Eating only greens doesn’t give me the kind of satisfaction because I know that there are good, real foods around. I bought fake kidney, fake liver, fake prawns, fake cuttlefish, fake chicken, fake goose, fake fish, fake eggs and fake everything. So, I pacify myself with these substitutes. And I manage to turn away from the foods (meats and fishes) I cooked for my hubby and kids.
Mamma mia, I received my enlightment! (sit yoga style) Ommmmmm…..I realised that these fake foods are like p0rn. You know you can’t have hunky guys, swing, turn lesbians or have threesome. So you peek a little and you just go on with your lives. You won’t get the urge to actually try them out. (Hey, this is how adults view p0rn, isn’t it? See only, never touch? Damn, I am only trying to extrapolate so don’t go twist my words that I am encouraging p0rn, ok?)
So, remember this enlightment I received. Those fake foods pacify and satisfy our human nature to be barbaric. As I tear a fake chicken drumstick apart, my soul knows that I am eating food. I chew on the wooden ice-cream stick and pretend I am chewing on chicken bones. BTW, I love to chew bones, serious. We humans are often challenged by the setan (devil) and therefore, no matter how pure we want to be, sometimes, our weaknesses will drive us nuts. So, don’t question why vegetarians are so fake and eat fake animals. We are only human, ok?
Well, I had been searching around to find out whether one can lose weight if one goes on vegetarian diet. Well, the answer is yes and no. If one eats healthily, vegetarian foods have lower calories than meat.
But, but, my body has changed! I can now wear bikini! Don’t believe? See this pic of mine? I dare not post it here la, afterwards some people die of heart attack or got choke. So, now you know what vegetarian diet can do for your boobs. It caused the boobs to run to the biceps. I lost my boobs! Thank you, Mr. Muscle Man for lending me the pic.