Rotten eggs! | The Obnoxious 5xmom

Life, Lies, Sex, Humor, Politics of a Malaysian blogger

The Obnoxious 5xmom

March 15th, 2006 at 3:19 pm

Rotten eggs!

» by Lilian in: Family, Humor

Damn! Overnight, I have ovo-phobia and share similar phobia as Alfred Hitchcock. Damn, damn, damn.

Can you farking believe that Tesco has rotten eggs? Last nite, 5xmom, the ever efficient woman wandered off grabbing groceries at the speed of lightning while atm was elsewhere, browsing through, buying only a single watermelon. My trolley was filled with lots of vegetables, toileteries and stuffs. Then, I head to the eggs section.

So, this cibai tray of eggs which I grabbed spilt the foulest, stinkiest, busuk smelling liquid. It dripped on the floor and my hands. I ran over to the fish section to wash it off from their tap. Not satisfied, I used the shampoo I had in the trolley to wash again. And I left the shampoo and didn’t buy it because the smell of the shampoo is going to traumatise me next time. (Helen’s Tesco coconut shampoo)

After that, I just can’t get rid of the smell. Poor atm has to smell every item in the trolley to find out where the stench came from. It was the watermelon. We paid for our stuffs and left the watermelon there.

No matter where I go, the stench follows me. It is worse then faeces. More like rotting animal corpse. I was beginning to think the the whole shopping mall people can smell me. Maybe they think I have a rotting clam or something, you know….green mucous out of the poohkey LOL. I feel like stripping off my clothes because it just stinks. But I can’t find which spot it is.

Passing by KFC, atm asked me if I want a McEgg. I went, huh? Then, I realised he is pulling my legs. OMG, don’t even mention anything about eggs. I am going to throw up.

Passing our church (while in the car, on the road ), we usually do a quick cross. I said something like ‘Oh my God, please wash away my stinks’. Can’t help it. It was so, so gross. And my kids echoed, “Please don’t pass any bird flu through the eggs.”

That’s why I can’t wait to get home and sanitize myself. So, the next time, you want to get even with your greatest enemy without murdering him, throw acid on her face or do anything against the law, just throw a rotten egg. Think about it? Just one tiny egg, pelt it on your husband’s mistress, the bitch who stole your boyfriend, the money digger who took away your BMW, your MIL who said you are not good enough for her daughter…..

(sorry, don’t mean to tarik harga and wait so long to post this. I was away this morning, at a supermarket furthest away from my home at Sunshine Square. Just so that I can buy fresh eggs.)

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28
  • maR
    3:37 pm on March 15th, 2006 1

    Telor busoookkkk…

  • Pelf
    4:08 pm on March 15th, 2006 2

    Oh gawd..!

  • julie
    4:18 pm on March 15th, 2006 3

    this auntie arr…. never failed to amused me..LOL :)

  • helen
    4:21 pm on March 15th, 2006 4

    Rotten eggs from Tesco!! LOL We have it here too in Ipoh Tesco….. not your kind though. It’s those u find in the Customer Service counter that does not service its customers… and dun speak one word of English. :-)

    Hey, Wait a minute!!! Tesco coconut shampoo where got smelly?????? It’s the best smelling shampoo around and it smells like coconut tart!! Hmmmm ** smelling my hair ** simply heavenly!!

  • Lilian
    4:28 pm on March 15th, 2006 5

    helen – aiyor, i am going to the beach again. But want to tell you, I wanted to buy ‘cos it smells nice. But imagine coconut and rotten eggs? Ewwss…the eggs spoilt it all! Cos the coconut smell can’t get rid of the rotten egg.

  • JC
    4:34 pm on March 15th, 2006 6

    oh my god…
    i just bought eggs from tesco yesterday nite …
    which brand ?

  • Cocka Doodle
    4:40 pm on March 15th, 2006 7

    Why didn’t you go into the church and try washing away the smell with ‘holy water’ ?

  • doc
    5:06 pm on March 15th, 2006 8

    Lemons! Lemons! They work even if you’re a necrophil!

  • Chief
    5:37 pm on March 15th, 2006 9

    wah….only can throw at lousy performer and politic
    ions

  • f1re80
    5:38 pm on March 15th, 2006 10

    poohkey got green liquid meh?

  • SkyJuice7
    7:43 pm on March 15th, 2006 11

    You poor thing! I won’t be able to ‘tahan’ if that happened to me too. I can’t stand the smell of smoke (think restaurants with bad ventilation) and smokey environment (bars with ciggy smoke all over the place). I stopped going to those kinds of places because I had to wash my whole body twice or thrice. I can’t imagine how many times I’d need a wash it a rotten egg spilt on me. Euuuuwwww! Btw, thanks for the tips, Lilian! *evil grin*

  • may
    11:22 pm on March 15th, 2006 12

    hmmmm, I’ve not smelled rotten egg before. that teruk ka? aiyo, I’ll take your word for it. I’ll keep a few rotten eggs handy for throwing at enemies!

  • simple american
    1:35 am on March 16th, 2006 13

    Wow! That must have been a powerful mix of odors. Rotten and sweet. Dun even sound sexy. Oh boy. Explains why you changed and cleaned up. Only thing worse is a skunk.

  • little pixie
    8:14 am on March 16th, 2006 14

    haiz.. i quit going to TESCO after they lost my thing which i left on the counter where u left ur purchases made from other stores before you go in.

  • Yvy
    8:15 am on March 16th, 2006 15

    O dear….that IS bad. Lol :P Glad you’re all clean now. :)

  • Queen Of The House
    10:42 am on March 16th, 2006 16

    Eeeewwww! I have had the unfortunate ‘advantage’ before, that’s why I guessed it right! Really really busuk wanna vomit kind of busuk. I had to air the whole house and spray air deodorisers in my kitchen. Puke puke I tak tahan just imagining the smell.

  • Domestic Rat
    10:51 am on March 16th, 2006 17

    Which brand? I’m wondering too.

  • Lilian
    1:07 pm on March 16th, 2006 18

    Queen of the House – I hope it is not the same brand of eggs?

    Yvy – Yeah, sort of. It is really pukey.

    little pixie – Oh reallly? Did you write to the GM? I think they are pretty efficient (top management).

    SA – I have yet to smell a skunk, but had been wondering about it ‘cos I read it in fairy tales since I was a kid! Send me a skunk. LOL.

    may – Yeah, throw at humsup lous oso good.

    skyjuice – I am going to be paranoid for life, everytime I crack an egg open.

    fire80 – I read got la. Dunno la, touch wood!

    chief – That’s right!

  • Lilian
    1:09 pm on March 16th, 2006 19

    doc – OMG, you just teach me another new word!

    necrophilia -An irresistible sexual attraction to dead bodies.

    Ewwws….

    Cocka – I am not demon possessed yet mah.

  • moo_t
    5:15 pm on March 16th, 2006 20

    Wah, good hint, I am gonna be rich. 5xmom, lets make make a business from the rotten eggs
    For female
    - Anti-rapist personnal kit
    - Anti-rapist/robbery car kit

    For protester and FRU.
    - Anti-crowd cluster rotten egg sprayer

    And don’t forget to sell the cure
    - Super strong lemon flavour revitaliser to clean the stench.

    Notes : All the product are sterilise,bird flu free and recyclelable
    :)

  • simple american
    6:26 am on March 17th, 2006 21

    I can send you some roadkill skunk. It seems like they just jump in front of cars lately. Don’t have to see them to know they were hit either. Pee-U!!! Stinky, stinky!

  • DORY
    10:39 am on March 17th, 2006 22

    hey … u really have no ethics one… u open and use the TESCO shampoo, then didnt buy it some more. haiyoo…

  • Lilian
    3:40 pm on March 17th, 2006 23

    Ya Dory, let me go to hell for that ok?

    SA – Ewwss..that stinky huh?

    moo – I think capital very low, we just need to help all the farmers get rid of their unsold eggs. But I dunno how to make eggs rot wor. Maybe we put Dory with the eggs.

  • Domestic Rat
    3:56 pm on March 17th, 2006 24

    SHIT. I just bought.

  • Malaysia Best » How fresh are your eggs?
    12:21 pm on April 5th, 2006 25

    [...] I had a traumatic rotten eggs experience recently at the Tesco supermarket. You can read about it on my personal blog. [...]

  • Mei
    12:58 pm on April 5th, 2006 26

    I wouldn’t blame the producer of those eggs but the store that stocked them. If you must avoid buying stuff, then avoid getting eggs from Tesco. They are the ones responsible for stocking rotten produce.

  • farnaway
    10:33 am on June 19th, 2006 27

    Hi Lilian, I happen to found your blog during a google search.  I have written a letter to them outlining your case, and perhaps they will look into the matter.

    By the way, Nice blog you have here.

  • AT
    6:42 pm on June 19th, 2006 28

    Dear Lilian,

    I just came across your comments on this web blog.

    I am sorry to hear about your unpleasant experience. If you care enough, we would appreciate if you could let us know the details of your purchase. Like the expiry date, whether it was one egg out of the ten or quite a few of them. Is this your first experience with our product or you are a frequent purchasers? This will help us a lot in our investigation.

    We assure you that we would do our best endeavour to deliver our services and products in a satisfying manner to all our consumers. We hope you would come directly to us for your comments and experience and alert us for any of our shortcomings. With this, we would hope that it will bring the level of our civil society and service level in the country in a respectful manner.

    We appreciate your humour and we hope that at the same time people are educated and enlightened too.

    Please, you are welcome to write to us at my personal email address at (email removed)
    Meanwhile we would appreciate if you could remove our name from the blog.

    Thank you.

    Yours sincerely,

    AT

    (this comment has been edited by the admin to upon the request of the company)

 

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