Can you handle a hot bod?

For the last few nights, I had been going out for meals because I am like a hungry lion set free after 49 days eating nothing but grass.

That barbaric state of mind prevails right up to my eyes. Other than tearing pieces of bloodied medium rare steak, tough gulai daging, dim sum and etc, I practically tear people apart with my eyes. I know this is bad but since I had done it, let me confess it, ok?

Case one – This woman is probably in her early 50s. But her body is so firm and busty. You can tell from her face that she is old, inspite of the ICI and Dulux paints plus plasters of paris and cements. Her back was facing me. She was wearing this skin tight pants and a lacey bare back blouse. She is hot! Surprisingly, her body skin is still taut and there are no dangling flabby upper arms. She was with the three old men. Really old men, probably 60s. The kind where they like to wear thick gold watches, jade rings, Montagut t-shirt that costs RM200-RM300.

Case Two – The next one I met was like Michelle Yeoh. Flowing long hair, slim body, super expensive sunglasses, huge diamond rings on well manicured hands. She is also maybe about 50s. She was with two old rich men too.

So, while chewing on my meats, I wonder secretly to myself. Supposedly, one day, a fairy godmother appeared and grant this pumpkin a body like that, would I be able to handle it? I mean, if I had that kind of body, I know I would flirt around with men and make other women envy. Well, it is one heck of a wishful thinking because I know I can never, ever, forever be like them. But if I really have that body, I know I certainly cannot just remain like what I am. Seriously, think about it?

Assuming, one day you woke up and you suddenly have a great body, do you think you will not have second or third thoughts of testing how valuable it is? Wouldn’t you be dining and wining with a bunch of men, cracking jokes, hitting them playfully, looking at them coyly etc etc?

Since I am on this subject, there is this one guy. Married, with kids. Wife so-so looking. He had been doing some strenous exercise, pierced ear, skin tight t-shirts and the whole works. He is damn good looking. Each time I see him, I can only look up and thank God that my old man is not into these major makeover. Otherwise, I will be spending sleepless nights wondering what he is up to. Ah…the bliss of being so-so looking instead of having hot bods.

(my rant on Paula Abdul on American Idol)