Desperate singles seeking matchmaker

Buahahahahaha…I just picked up some free newspaper and found out about this dating service. Their claim is – You are single, successful, charming yadda yadda yadda but you are too busy so you pay them to arrange lunch dates for you.

My foot! If really everyone got such great criterias like PhD, CEO, doctors, lawyers (that’s the claim, ok?) and they still can’t even date a single human, then, they probably got major big problem lah wei.

Seriously, how hard is it to target on the person of the opposite sex, chat the person up, find excuses to get in touch etc and then, zoom in on going out for a meal or coffee? Then, proceed to whatever you want next? Even school kids also can lah.

So, what I want to say is – You either have that charm or you don’t. If you have, you can date the boss, the boss’s son, the delivery boy right down to the Bangla janitor. If you don’t, well, you need to ask 5eksmom for some relationship tips. Then, only you invest in that “actually going for lunch” only dating service.

(die! 5eks looks like Seks hor?)

So, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, take a number, queue up and learn what you need to charm the opposite sex before you actually go for lunch. I won’t even charge you. Plus I can throw in some fengshui compatibility tests, patchee (eight pillar), numerology readings, horoscope and Chinese animal zodiacs and if you want more, I can even bless you to find your life partner. The catch is to read more 5eksmom, drop more comments and who knows, you may just click with the next commentor.

Afterall, I have experiences as a matchmaker.

17 thoughts on “Desperate singles seeking matchmaker

  1. Auntie, ticket No.1…numero uno…So, I am here to learn from u lor. 🙂

  2. Mari! Mari! We set up a “Dating Skills” school, not a dating service lah. We charge one time only for training on tips on how to date and after that the participants can go out there and date as much as they want, no need to pay for dating service ler.

  3. Serious, I dun think it’s such a bad idea if this agency are not out to con ppl with false dates. Afterall, there are many who do not have opportunities to meet more people.

    You’re right, not many are chamers. But, how many charmers are sincere? 😛 lol

  4. Quickly sign up affiliate program with fireangel. 😉

    p/s: Are you playing some dual/tri/quasi with 5eks brand?
    – In geeks word, S is substitute with 5. ;p
    – Again “eks” can be scrambled to kes(KES, a 1969 movie, A tale of a boy and his bird???), kse(karachi stock exchange??? Pakistanist????), sek(wink,wink), ske(skeet?).

  5. Following on from moo_t: does the brand name 5sekmom means your dating agency making any promises ar?

    *innocent look*

  6. kenny, Malaysian chinese,35,handsome and charming,Mech Eng holder project manager, looking for a chinese women in age range between 25-35 with established career.

  7. oh hey i read it too!! TheSun rite? kekeke..
    I thought of blogging about it too!!!
    But i think the advertisement was quite welldone. Makes it not look “cheap” if you know what i mean. Could be a good thing for professional socializing if there is such a thing la…

  8. Linda, Malaysian Chinese, born in the year of rat, pleasant looking, Master in Education, Admin Work, looking for a fun, loving, financial stable life partner. Chemistry must click. Must be above 35 years old.

  9. lilian, seriously, you don’t know there are occupations that really makes you no chance at all. I was lucky that I had a steady boyfriend before I started working. It was said that in the industry I worked in, people without partner will end up be bachelor forever – or until they quit. I used to work 7 days a week, from 8am till 2am, daily. Lunch? 15min rush lunch, or just tahpao. Dating colleagues? Ya, probably that’s the only chance, but nowadays we gals have pride and would rather go singles instead of simply grab some available guys that we don’t like. You see… that’s how it ended with so many ‘high quality singles’. I’m no longer in that industry now. Rather get paid less but have a better work life balance.

  10. Step aside, everyone! Let me sign up…no, not for me but for KNB, QV and Laksa!!! 3 most eligible bachelors…who somehow failed to qualify for Cleo’s 50 most eligible! Two of them, I probably can guess why! No camera with lenses wide enough to take their photos!

  11. Bryan, Malaysian Chinese, going to be 25, single and available since 2004, from Penang, graduating in August 06 (provided if I pass my thesis), no asset yet (except my clothes, handphone and PC), financially not very stable (yet!), work at home, love sports…

    Wei LiLian, like this enough info to get me a date liao or not?

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