Ah Weng’s career as a ghost writer

I got setori to tell you all. My good friend, Ah Weng got an offer to be a ghost writer. Fuwah, Ah Weng damn happy at first. He asked me,

“Ei, last time you wrote for the papers, you got paid how much jek?”

I replied, “Not much jek, only 25 cents to 35 cents per word and usually, one piece is about RM300-400 only.”

Ah Weng then told me, “Si jeh, I got offer for RM3 wor. To be a ghost writer.”

I fast-fast tell Ah Weng grab the job. “Theen-kong-tiau lor….(hakka lah), RM3 per word, that means one piece you earn about RM2K. Like that you no need to count USD3 cents anymore?”

So, Ah Weng took out the email and read again.

Monkey

We almost died laughing. Because the bugger wanted to offer my good blogger friend, Ah Weng RM3 PER PIECE. Ah Weng’s Technorati ranking, Alexa ranking, Google ranking semua hampalang manyak kerng wan, you know…….

“Si heng, RM3 not enough to buy toilet papers to wipe your ass after you lausai from too much beef foldover jek!”

“Si jeh, RM3 also not enough for you to pay for sanitary pads jek.”

“Si heng, RM3 only can buy you one round of condoms, jek.”

“Si jeh, RM3 not enough for you to buy KY jek.”

“Si heng, RM3 can buy enough peanuts. I later go feed the monkeys in Botanical Gardens. Then, I ask them they want to be ghost writers anot, ok?”

*Ini adalah kisah benar. Akan tetapi, ini tidak ada berkaitan dengan sesiapa, biar bapok kah, pondan kah. Mati khong kah khiau kah, jual telur masin kah.”

Moral of the setori : Never write to a taukeh with his own factory and staffs and ask if he wants RM3 per day.

12 thoughts on “Ah Weng’s career as a ghost writer

  1. hahaha

    i received some email offering me RM TIGA to be a ghost writer also..

    chi seen.rm 3 wanna eat lorong selamat char kuay teow also not enuff.sucker.

  2. You all dowan then let sifu write lar. For RM3 I can write a lot of thing about that tak-tau-malu mya olangkan!

  3. Portugal – He sells Por-chiew-khee egg tarts lor.

    doc – HOHOHO, sifu sart sau.

    michael – Why, you not being offered a career like that?

    ahpek – Like that jatuh standard lor. One month you write also not enough for you to drink one night oh kau, how?

    gbyeow – Kari sahaja, telur pun tak mau.

    ST – I see no evil, I hear no evil, I say no evil…..:P

    RB – Ah Weng is the butcher I know from the market wor…You also get offer like that? How come no one offer me leh.

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