Stop talking about child neglect unless you have walked a mile in those parents’ shoes

In an ideal world, the ideal family has the ideal time to take care of their kids. In a stark, harsh world things happen. Sometimes, it is not beyond the control of the parents.

So, all you farkers out there who are so clever to talk about Nurin’s parents, I want to ask you back. “Have you walk a mile in their shoes? ”

Aren’t the pain of losing their child in such a brutal manner enough? Must every damn bloggers get their piggie back ride and talk like some losers? Leave the issue alone. I know Allah will give strength to the parents. I know Allah will bring justice. We will never comprehend why. We will never.

I too used to leave my little kids at home when I was taking care of my critically ill son in the ICU. What choice do I have? My eldest was only 11 years old and he had to cook instant mee for his younger brothers who were 9 and 6 years old for the meals. Do you think I love to leave them alone? Do you think I do not know the danger of them at home alone? Do you think I enjoy it?

The doctor, Dr. Cheang knew about it too. He knew I got no other option. I was staying in one corner and my siblings are another. Driving to drop my kids meant wasting precious time, time which my sick son can die anytime. Sometimes, we were called in the middle of the night and our children had to skip school because we couldn’t come back in time.

One day, Dr. Cheang prayed for my son. And his words, “Heavenly Father, please watch over Vincent’s brothers and keep them safe when his mom and dad are here taking care of Vincent.” was the most comforting of all. That’s what probably drove me to Christianity too.

So get it in all of your heads. The parents did not want it to happen. The parents never expect it to happen. It just happened. She is dead. Leave the family alone.

Wake up, the world is not all rosy like what all of you think. That every parent can be there 100% of their time. Sometimes, kids are mischievous. Sometimes, parents are too poor and had other things to attend. It is very unfortunate but we got no choice.

As for the craps from Ng Yen Yen (she was the first to quote the ‘do not neglect your child’) and all the Chief of Police and etc, I can tell them, Go die. Talk cock is very easy.

I am very pissed because always, always have to wait for tragedy to happen and then, crap by 2 weeks, we forget them.

Damn, I wish to make a video and post on Youtube like that tranny Chris asking to leave Britney alone. This one is much more dramatic because I can cry much harder than Chris. Leave Nurin’s parents alone. Though I am not a tranny.

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36 Replies to “Stop talking about child neglect unless you have walked a mile in those parents’ shoes”

  1. Let me start it off, with a short one… People see what they can see. What they can’t see, they don’t even bother to look into it. So they just say what they see lo… Well, human are judgmental specie la, let them judge lo… But how easy for me or you to tell them, at the end of the day people have to face it to understand it.

  2. I never write about them hor, even though I admit the temptation to write was there.

    Firstly, I have to admit that I am one of those who thought that the parents shouldn’t have let their kids run wild like that. This is not heaven we live in. However, i do not agree what others are doing to the parents. I read people leaving them hate messages etc. The parents have suffered enough, whether or not they have fault in this case. The most important thing to tackle now is to find the murderer and stop this bullcrap from happening again.

    That is if we still remember about this in the next two weeks, as you pointed out. We don’t live in one of the safest places in the world, that no one can deny. What is “anyone” doing about it?

  3. tenthofmarch – yalor, yalor, do you see how many quote and unquote and quote and unquote pings on PPS? The thing is our Government is pushing too much for development without taking care of the basic family units. So, in order to achieve all those high dreams of biggest, tallest and etc, the family unit suffers.

    wong – Exactly. The amount of high profile ministers talking and with the bloggers repeating their moronic words are not helping at all.

  4. Lilian, its so easy for people to pass judgments. But , like you said, have they walked a mile in Nurin’s parents shoes? I am just appalled at the lack of sensitivity.
    The same is happening here over the Maddie MacCanne case. When no culprits can be found – blame the parents. It is easy.
    Take care.

  5. there are still a lot of unsolved rape,d murdered, robbed case hanging around Malaysia, and it’s increasing at an alarming rate, did the authority care ? hell they do !

    why is our living condition in this country is getting worse ? can we deserve something better ?

  6. Hi Lilian,

    That is the whole damn problem with the current administration and also the corrupt policemen. Instead of solving the actual problem at hand, they like to divert attentions to another rubbish that they can thought of. As always trying to find another scapegoat and in this case, the parents are careless and crap like that.

    This is a doomed country and viewing this video will actually open your eyes bigger:

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/programmes/hardtalk/6992908.stm

    From top to bottom we have fucking dumb asses.

  7. i too was quite astonished to know they are actually blaming the parents… and there is some negligence rule or something like that?

    but the again…it’s hard to understand why would the parents allow her to travel to the pasar malam alone and it’s already quite late.

    i guess i will never understand until i become a parent.

  8. We are asked to showing compassion, but often pointing fingers is easier, because it doesn’t require us to get out of our comfort zone.

    One single mother i know left her 3 children at home with some bread when she got to work outstation. It’s not like she has options, she got to work to feed her children!

    Before they are placed in the after school care runs by a NGO. The eldest 9 years boy took care of the 6 and 8 years old when mommy was at work or out station for 2-3 days. He is a small sized fragile boy, but his maturity is way beyond his age, a smart boy too.

    On a brighter note, such circumstances do raise tough children, they are not whiny and spoiled like those who live in comfort and has everything.

  9. So it is the parents’ fault that the society is corrupted and crimes happen? what happened to the government and law enforcers’ responsibility to create a peaceful nation at first place?

    i’ve only got 2 words to say – Utter bullshit!

  10. well i feel the same way u do… i think it’s not easy being a parent… especially being a good one…

    i know u’re a good mother lilian.. i don’t know how u do it

  11. Dear Ms. Lilian,

    Shall I call you aunty Lilian, instead? Now, I believe what had happened and about to happen in the past or in the future is all parents fault. I know everyone seems to be pissed and all about what had taken place lately in our so called peaceful multi racial society. I realize that could it be kids or adults these days are out of hands and ‘mischevious’ like you put it in your blog. I don’t blame kids. I blame parents. Why…? We have one good example here for us all to see and to learn… like yourself. You claim that you have children, you claim that you love your religion and believe in it, you claim that you are a good mother and thus you are a good housewife… now the truth is otherwise. Well, I have been reading people’s blogs and I know they are right to some extend. But, you as a Mother, as a Wife and as a person who your kids are going to follow and obey should set an example. What with all this abusive and cursing words…? Are we lacking of other words in this world? Should you need a thesaurus to replace those ‘Unhealthy’ words, I would be glad to donate one. Well, on second thought, parents have failed to set good examples to their kids and as a result, how can you expect to have wonderful society when your mothers cursing people everywhere. So, that is the latest development of the country huh…? See, you fail again… you parents fail again and will fail again because you never put yourself as a model to our new generation. So, let me be honest and truthful to you readers out there… ask yourself a question… Should a mother of a few kids use such abusive and harsh words writing about people…? What sort of generations are we building up here…? Are we preparing our kids to curse us back one day…? Or are what…? Now, aunty Lilian, your family is always your family… your kids are always yours… but don’t forget that one day your kids are going to be living with someone else kids… thus.. this acts like a VIRUS. Virus spreads and when it spreads far and wide… everyone will be affected. People can always be soft and yet firm. If you are a wise person, a person who hold a status of a mother… you should stop acting like a scumbag who probably has got no future and nothing to look forward in life. You see, there are two types of people in this world… the wise and the silly. Which one is you? This is not a beauty contest…who writes something harsh will be respected and followed… often time people hate those with abusive words especially when those words come from a person called MOTHER or FATHER. That isn’t an option…. Think about it, aunty. Act Like One…

    M

  12. M – I have two words for you – Fuck off.

    And if you notice, I took off the f word because Google doesn’t allow it. Not because of you. Again, fuck off.

  13. Oh ya, M, I was expecting douche bags like you to come by with your self-righteous mind. And you just fall into my trap. How long did it take you to write the above comment? Want me to sponsor you a free blog? I pity people like you. So many pent up feelings, no where to let go, have to come to my blog and release.

    Urban dictionary explanation on douche bag : somebody whom you think is a complete retard and doesn’t know anything about what they’re talking about aka M.

  14. M ah M, I like Lilian’s cursing leh. Very well respected what, where got problem? The big problem here is that you can’t spell “Mischievous”. So bugger off already.

    btw, would you kindly donate the thesaurus you mentioned to me instead? I’m in dire need of thesauruses.

  15. Little Ray – Your earlier question? Very hard to measure up wan, unless you got blue hair and looks like an Ah Beng. And terror in flaming douche bags like M.

  16. M, It’s very dull to read holier than thou hypocrite blogs. They are very predictable. Give me 5xmom anytime. More entertainment value. I read blogs to entertain myself, not to educate myself again with pendidikan moral.

  17. i agree! really dun understand y ppl have to blame Nurin’s parents for neglect! damn! it’s already over..if ppl were of any use..they would’ve helped Nurin..i mean…i bet somebody at least saw something..but being a typical msian…sure onli hide one side and peep! geez!

    her parents are sad enough..stop making matters worst! damn..ppl onli know how to talk..haih

  18. Apparently they live in a low cost 2 bedroom flat. Just imagine yourself staying in a 50 feet x 10 feet space = 500 sq feet. That is how the “other” Malaysia is living and see if you feel like going to the pasar malam everyday. THey don’t ask for sympathy. JUst empathise as count yor blessings.

  19. hello all, all of you shouldn’t blame the government for such “professionalism” (both in their daily job functions and innovative accusations) … the police force (a.k.a. govn) have to send a batallion of policemen hunting the 37+ rioters who caused havoc and burnt the national flag recently … hence they’re short of manpower – pls understand them …

    the standard operating procedure taught was the national flag is more important than any single life and soul in this country, with the exception of vip, of course …

    so instead of admitting the police are totally screwed-up, they have to pass the blame on someone, who else to blame except their parents? … that’s how they achieve their kpi or whatever crap … and you don’t think they are any near in getting to the killer, do you?

    that’s why when those politicians who didn’t care about the public safety but got robbed instead, i actually clap non-stop for 2 hours (bet even lilian can’t do that) …. and i cried when the indonesian maid who ran away with millions of jewelleries from the home of the law minister got arrested days thereafter … not that i like to promote crimes or something like that but it requires the buggers (can i use the f-word) to taste the medicine to know its bitterness …

    cheers …

  20. Wow…thanks for all the comments… well at least someone notices my mistake… Now… still cursing huh….? Well, aunty… it didn’t take me that long to write it up.. I guess it will take a long time for you to STOP cursing… Well, hope those abusive words that you used and are using will go back to yourself one day and believe me… your kids are none better than plain scumbags like their mother… Now… I am not blaming them for that for I know where the SEED is from…. So, just a piece of advice middle aged woman… would you mind stop cursing people… what a shame…? Man… the last thing that we want is a society that comes out from women or men who curse a lot… So, for the rest of the readers… stay with you 5X Cursing mothers… I bet your life will be so “meaningful”. I pity those kids of yours knowing that their mother is nothing but a cursing ‘beeatch’… Oh.. did I spell that right…? You know I don’t curse like you guys especially the so called MOTHER. Yea… yea… bla…bla… It is because of people like YOU… other Fellow bloggers are facing lots and lots of problems… Now… stop it or you will be stopped… We have your pictures… we know where you are… and please… act wisely… Don’t tell us that we don’t warn you… Now… this country though not as great as other advanced countries around the world we still have freedom and peace. So, don’t try to be funny by stirring it up. Now, fire is hot.. then try not to burn yourself…cuz it may not as crunchy as it sounds like. My advice…. please stop cursing… I am very sure your blog will gain more attention if you stop cursing…

  21. hello lilian,

    i’m vino, one of ur many young fans currently counting her lucky stars to be able to live overseas…i’m studying so it’s not all bed of roses btw…
    i just wanted to tell u i really enjoy your blog, n check in every other day for updates…
    i appreciate the fact that u take the time n trouble to update ever so often, juggling blogging with many other responsibilities you hv, being a mother, a wife, a devout Christian, n a kick-ass blogger….keep up the good work!
    i for one enjoy ur paid posts here…i find them very informative….n its good cos u include ur own experience….n not jst lie n write it fr the sake of pure cash fullstop…..it’s genuine n many out there are sadly, losing that of late…
    i was just gonna respond to M’s comment….dude, malaysia is not an advanced country….it’s a third world country….open your eyes n do some research, there r some organizations out there-which are not UN related, sending in troops to help certain tribes etc in malaysia….now one of the checklist of being a developed/advanced country is only UN selected troops of help/aid goes to these countries, for catastrophic incidences and such-likes…so yes, to talk with facts is bein intelligent, which of course gets ppl to listen to u…but to talk like an empty vessel is really like what most malaysians sitting in coffee-shops do…this is a constructive critisism, so take it with an open heart, n not of spite…
    all de best lillian, take care and enjoy the rest of your day 🙂

  22. *smack forehead* M,people talking about child neglect and you talking about this cursing. Cursing can cause people to torture kids like that and murder people is it? Cursing can bring about such terrible crime is it? Everyone curses. One time or another. Its no surprise. Don’t act like a saint la. If we keep all those emotion in us, not saying it out, we will go cuckoo la. Then there’ll be even more crime happening. DONT KEEP IT IN YOU!!!LET IT OUT!!! Its better to curse that to keep everything inside and till one day, u cannot take it anymore and start committing crime

  23. Xan – LOL, yeah, nutcase.

    ahbu – I don’t know what cursing means cos now M makes me totally confused. He not only curse me, but threaten me. Somemore wanna offer me a Thesaurus dictionary worrrr.

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