**Warning : This is not some religious post, so spare me your holy-moly thoughts and wise opinions. I am NOT asking for it.**
Why it is hard to be Christian?
I was not feeling well yesterday evening due to tummy cramps, courtesy of Aunt Flo so I had to skip church and SMS-ed to cancel my OHP duty.
Last week, I already ponteng church because I wasn’t feeling well too because…errmm…ah…ermmm..ahhh…I forgot why.
So, just last night, I went to sleep, not feeling like going today because I am sure I am still feeling cramping. Another ponteng church excuses. But prolly Jesus kicked my fat butt out of my sleep and I woke up with a jolt at 9.30 am. 10 am is mass. You know the kind of feelings? You woke up suddenly like you have something and yet, you struggle not to bother.
In the end, I went because church is only 5 minutes from home on a Sunday morning. But before I can even get into the building, I already feel very geram because the car park is full again. This is something no one likes to bring to the attention of the church. I am not going to do it either. You know lah, Christians are supposed to be kind, nice, understanding, altogether holy and don’t do these kind of things one.
I want to grumble already, “Eh, you all finish your service liao, go home lah. Leave some space for us, can ah? I know it is good to have a nice community, have coffee after your mass, build the kingdom and such but still….the next batch of church goers really need the parking space. This is also community what? Go some kopitiam or somewhere and drink the coffee lah.”
But of course, I want to be the nice Christian like everyone, so I kwai-kwai drive around the block, looking for some pavement low enough for my car to drive up. You know, dangling the car half on the road, half on the kerb. If my atm see I park like that, he will ngam-ngam-cham-cham about axel wateva bengkok bla bla bla. I don’t care lah, I can hear the opening hymn already, meaning mass begun.
Ok, into the church building I went. I confess, almighty Lord, for I have sinned…In my words and in my thoughts, in what I have done and in what I have failed to do……
But few minutes later, there I go again. I am a lector and when my fellow lectors proclaim the Word of God, I want to absorb them. I want to hear what St. Peter is telling us. When lector proclaims the Bible, we are supposed to listen. But how do I hear it when the two folks behind my pew is chatting about their past week? Grrr….The urge of not turning my head to look is very strong.
There I go again. Into the recyle bin, wash and re-start all over again. So, that’s why it is hard to be Christian. It is a constant struggle.
After that, we heard that the High Court will be handling some Allah issue end of this month. Good Christians are suppose to pray and leave it in God’s hands that we shall see justice because the word Allah has been used since the time of St. Francis Xavier (in the 13th century?). But bad Christian like me, will pray too. But I also want to say, “Aiyah, no need to say also sure kena thrown out by our courts wan lah…You know who is controlling the law here, not the law but the in-laws.”
See? In the recyle bin, wash and re-start all over again. And in that one hour alone, I don’t know how many times my thoughts strayed and failed to live up to what Christians are supposed to be. Have faith in God, be nice, be kind.
But hey, God loves me, nevetheless. I am His chosen one, still. I may be the rejected goods but still I will cling to my God. Recyle, wash,restart,recycle,wash,restart…..That’s what being a Christian is. Accept our weaknesses and keep turning back and hope for God’s grace. Better that than be a total hypocrite who wears white outside and all black inside. Correct?
Now, where are all my neighbours lah? Wei, I cannot last very long with my Celcom line lah, later my phone burned. Pinjam, can?
Something to ponder. Have you brought anyone to Christ?
God Bless.
It is not for me to talk about these things because I respect the privacy of the people I evangelize to. I cannot be bragging that I have brought how many people to Christ (like how many bonuslink points I collected when I was shopping in Parkson) because that to me, it part of our Christian duty and none of us should even openly ask anyone to ponder. And I don’t know why you are interested to know, in the first place? Did you not read my first para?
Eh, got check your mailbox ?
Lilian – Biasalah. Everytime you mention anything regarding religion. Super heroes and so called messengers of faith will comment. Never fails to amaze me. You are never entitled to mention even the word eventhough its your site. Sigh. Sein hor??? š
Phone can burn going online??? Don’t believe. I wanna see. Bwahahaha!!!!
lol like yr statement on the law. surprise u didnt mention outlaw lol š
anyway, just to share, i realise a lot of religious ppl rather kwai on religious days (in fact religious hours only) – no honning, smiling, caring… but after that, alamak, hell break loose!
I love this post. It’s so familiar to my own struggles. Sometimes I feel like there’s a conspiracy to prevent me from finding a blessing at church, from how I feel, to parking spots, to people saying things up front that make me mad. Who knows, maybe there IS a conspiracy!
People who know they are constantly in the wash-restart cycle are so much more enjoyable and attractive, in the end, than those who think they don’t need it.
QuaChee – You also notice hor? Alim kucing oni š
Terence – Imagine lah, if people cannot even get the one sentence I wrote on the first line, how are they going to under the Big Book hor? Wei, you also got the cilaka P1i, ok? If I put it into that what-what holder to connect as a modem to my laptop, it heats up. And then hor, if I leave it there for few hours while I handle my Nigerian scam and Swiss accounts (I think if I repeat a few more times, people will eventually believe mah), I sked the modem also konk out.
shadowfox – Check liao, nothing wor.
Ginger – Ya, it is much less scary than those who are righteous. That’s why I always preach I prefer the narrow path of the 1 and not the 99.
lilian: email me at mr.shadowfox@gmail.com got something to ask you. Can’t seem to send you email from your blog’s form.
Aiya…I think most catholics also like one la…. including me. Maybe that’s why they make it compulsory to go to church every Sunday so that if our attention stray this week then can try again next week ma…
No sked later receive another loooong email ah? Haha…
Bryan – Then I baru got bloggable material somemore.
Paul – Hahaha, shhhhh…
shadowfox – Ok ok. Got your mail about Pak Lah already.
just make sure you don’t stray when controlling the OHP… one mistake and everyone look at you liau.. Muahahaha!!!
fuckin moron you really don’t know what u ar write about…LOL
In the very first place, why you started this post on religion when you don’t want people to comment. Here you go to church trying to be a good guy and then you curse and swear and encourage others to do that in your blogs. If you are really not happy, no one force you to serve in church. I am really scared for you trying to play with God, man. You don’t know what youare getting yourself into. You are like the bible say – antichrist. Jesus and Paul also say that they (antichrist) are among us but NOT with us. They went out from us. The way you talk, you are NOT the chosen ones but more of antichrist. You can be free in what you say but when God has enough from you, you will know. Sounds like I am preaching but i am not not. Just wanna warn you only. You are playing with fire ……. God takes each of us seriously and if you are not, then don’t ever start topics which can lead you to GOd’s wrath. Be general …….
Oooo…God’s little helper, who tell you I go to church because I want to be a good guy ah? And the next time you see god to get your auditing assignments, please tell god that hell has plenty of spaces, he may want you to go and do your auditing there.