All I wish for my next birthday is cleavage!
Posted on September 25th, 2008 by Lilian • Filed under: Life and rants
I have a friend who bought a box of supplement call Nuvafemme and wanted to take it to help with her period but was told that her condition cannot be treated with foods supplements only. So, she wanted to give it me.
Initially, she asked me if I want it to relieve painful period, reduce PMS and regulate my period. I told her, “Choy…no need, my period is more accurate than your gaji. Sure come one, no need. Somemore, I don’t need big big ‘bullets’ one. My bocor is not like the bocor in Parliament. And if I don’t have PMS, how am I going to remain obnoxious?”
Then, she whispered to me, “Eh, I read that Nuvafemme can make your boobs bigger worrrr…..Sure you don’t want ah? They also say can give you beautiful skin lehhh.”
I freaked out! I asked her if it is some hormone supplements as I know that those are dangerous. She insisted it is not and said it contains only soy content. I already know that soya products can give big boobs and the scary part is, even men can develop boobs if they take too much.
But my friend told me the box said the soy extract is manufactured by a WHO GMP approved manufacturer with no genetically modified source and is organic grown. Somemore hor, she said Daphne Iking promotes it! I am sure most of you have seen the sexy Daphne, right?
Now, that got me interested because *in whisper mode* who doesn’t want an extra alphabet mah, right? From cup B to C wor…….I asked her if it has been approved or not? She told me the supplement nuvafemme is sold in pharmacies like Guardian, Watson and etc.
Not satisfied, I reminded her that I am touching menopause lor, ok to take it or not ah? Later I turned into hairy gorilla leh? But I read on the Nuvafemme site that it is actually good for women over 40 years old.
Nuvafemme works by modulating (balancing) the female hormone, estrogen.
For ladies below 40, because of stress, unbalanced diet resulting in imbalance hormone that shows up as period pain, breast tenderness, acne days before menses occur. Nuvafemme helps control the ‘wild fluctuation’ preventing period pain.
For ladies over 40, the body stops producing estrogen and this results in menopausal symptoms such as irregular periods, alternating with very heavy period, wrinkles formation, higher risk of osteoporosis, hot flushes, sweating profusely and uncontrolled mood swings.
So, I took the box of Nuvafemme from her lor since it is free. I have taken three tablets per day for several days before I read that I only need two tablets per day. *pengsan* I hope I haven’t overdose and wake up and become Pamela Anderson or Dolly Parton. Yorrr….imagine bursting out of my t-shirts!
Now, I don’t know if it can really give me flawless skin like what they claim on their site. I also do not know if the boobs magic work. But I do know that there are lots of isoflavones in there and that means, I don’t need to drink my hated soya bean milk.
So, ladies, you wait for a while and I will tell you when I need to buy new bras. And don’t stare at my breasts to check everytime you meet me, now that you know I am taking Nuvafemme. Sigh…the things I do for a friend and for money (cos the box from my friend is free one mah….)
Ladies and germs, you think my birthday wish can be fulfilled? Who else wants bigger boobs?