This is an excerpt from the NST article which I hope to archive on my blog. You can read the original article on NST.
THEY share both good and bad news, helpful tips and much-needed advice. Many have not even met but have forged a bond brought on by sharing the joy and challenges of parenthood.
Parent bloggers, as they’re known, are an increasingly strong presence on the Internet, a community of people who write about everything and anything to do with parenting and raising a family in today’s high-pressured environment.
“Parenting has changed so much and the challenge of being one today and raising a happy, stable child is tremendous,” said Chan Lilian.
The mother of four from Penang, who started blogging in 2004, is a firm believer in learning and sharing from other parents.
Chan was among 120 parent bloggers who showed up for a gathering organised by Nuffnang Malaysia and Frisco Gold Growing Up Milk on Nov 29.The event was an opportunity for blogging parents and their children to meet in person and catch up with one another after friendships formed online.
Chan first realised the immense comfort and relief that other parents could provide after the death of her fourth child, a premature baby.
Despite wanting to join a support group for other parents who had lost a child, she couldn’t find one in Malaysia and eventually signed up with an online group based in the United States.
“Losing a child is the most traumatic episode that any parent can undergo. I’ve always been a strong person but the incident not only changed my perspective on life but made me realise the importance of sharing my feelings with others,” said Chan.
She eventually started a similar support group for Malaysian women in 2002.
Chan blogs about all kinds of parenting issues, including the challenges and frustrations of being a stay-at-home mum.
For many women, taking the step of quitting their jobs and staying at home for their children can be the most pivotal decision they ever make, she said.
Chan struggled with this when she decided to become a full-time mother after the birth of her third child and has shared her experience of doing so on her blog.
Chan said many women worry that they may lose their identity and confidence or that they would end up craving for adult conversation after being around children the whole day.
“The ability to share with others through a blog can make a lot of difference. For stay-at-home mums, it’s an outlet to communicate with other adults and you feel like you’re not alone. There’s a light at the end of the tunnel.”
Chan also blogs on youth-related issues, politics and topics involving women as these too affect the family unit.
Lilian, u have done well to manage your grief – by sharing with others through a blog.
Early this year, I lost my young daughter too! It was so traumatic that I felt like dying! My world stood still – moving around like a zombie!
She left behind a blog, then one sleepless night, I told myself, I’ve to be strong in order to keep her blog ‘alive’ in memory of her!
Starting with zero knowledge on blogging, I’ve to struggle hard(sometimes with thick skin) to learn how to get it going!
Now, I ‘talk’ to her in her blog! There are people who commented that I’m crazy to ‘talk’ to a dead person and to cling on to a sad memory.
I don’t care what they say about my action. What I know is that, blogging can be a good therapy to manage grief because it does not only keep me busy but I really feel good about it after ‘talking’ to her, as if she’s ‘alive’ in her blog!
This is my way of healing a very painful grief. It keeps my spirit going in memory of a loving virtual daughter who exists perpetually in the internet world!
Her friends and relatives from all over the globe read her blog. Some of them even contacted me and passed over some of her old photos(those that I do not know of) to be added to my collection.
Now, I’m a happier person. Like you, I changed my perspective on life. On top of that, I get to know new online friends and being able to chat/share our experiences.
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