Yesterday, I lamented in my Citizen Journalism blog about the contradictory message sent by the newly minted Information, Communications and Culture Minister Rais Yatim.

Today, I am totally dumbfarked by his statements (in bold) :

Rais Yatim warned bloggers that they will face the full brunt of the law if they “twisted the facts” in their writings.

So, how do we define twisted facts? If let’s say I hate my neighbour’s bigger boobs than mine and blogged that she is fat when she is just a wee bit plump and she found out about it. Can she claimed that I twisted fact and make a police report about it? Does the police have the time to entertain such reports?

bloggers have the right to criticise and voice out their opinions – as long as they were not twisting the facts and affecting the public.

So, let’s say my neighbour’s name is Puan Rose Mah and I said I suspected she had botox. All two of my blog readers, which are the public, were affected by the promise of taut skin like Rose Mah and they went out to have botox as well. But they found that their skin are not as taut. I had affected the public eventhough it was just all two of my blog readers. Is this counted as contravening the Communications and Multimedia Act.?

He also said that the communication department under the ministry would continuously monitor the blogging trend in the cyberspace.

Oh really? I am pretty sure Google, Blogger, WordPress, Yahoo and many other companies will love to learn the trick from you on how you monitor blogging trend in the cyberspace.

advising bloggers against writing untruths and touching on personal matters, adding that the errant ones would be penalised under the Communications and Multimedia Act.

So, what does this mean? Cannot touch on personal matters? Does this mean I cannot tell my blog readers that I cirit birit this morning, or what?

Therefore, my dear honourable Information Minister, what I am trying to say is, don’t set too many do’s and don’ts that cuntfused everyone. Just say one sentence “Thou can curse anyone thou liketh, including the 77 ancestors of the opposition parties but never write anything bad about Barisan Nasional. Period.” Senang kan? Tak yah pok pek pok pek tiga hari berturut-turut. Kami dah paham, beb…Buat pening kepala hotak kami baca garisan kelabu semua tu.

All quotes in bold taken from Malaysiakini