Let me see….

Thursday I ended up at the police station. It was one hour thirty minutes of chatting with the Investigation Officer from KL.

What can I say? It is getting tiring. All these never ending waiting.

It takes a lot not to get angry and start slamming the injustice that is going on. What more when it is happening to me? But I shall reserve all that anger within me because it is more fulfilling to deny people of my reaction.

God is great. He puts a few people that actually helped to put the tiny jigsaws into places. They made a few remarks, probably out of experience. And whatever they casually mentioned actually made a lot of sense to me. And I can slowly the real picture.

Friday night, I caught up with the citizen journalists. There is a part of me that no longer feel attached to the group. I joked with the senior ones and told them, “What to do…all of you do not want me anymore so I got kicked out.”

In a way it is true. I left the group with a lot of disappointment at the manner some of them reacted to my joining the State. But strangely, two years later, I found out that the worst troublemaker actually betrayed the group. Karma bites and I smiles.

Saturday morning, I joined them again. And in my heart, I was utterly proud that my ‘big boss’ is their guest of honour. Actually, I don’t intend to go because I have a church weekend. But I went anyway because I want to see how my ‘big boss’ blend in to the group. He is very supportive and I am so proud of his openness to this new media.

Spent Saturday in church and discovered many, many things about myself. Those that can’t be mentioned.

Saturday evening I embarked on my little adventure. I had always wanted to do it and finally I did it on Saturday. I wore a saree and I love it.

At the dinner, big boss mentioned about one of the ex-citizen journalist becoming his staff. I put up my hand and waved and he was surprised because he couldn’t recognise me. His bodyguard, my good buddy also couldn’t recognise me though he knew it was me.

So, yeah, my adventure of wearing a piece of 6m cloth and trying not to trip over was fun. I dare not even take the stairs and took the elevator though it was one floor. Now when I see Indian women walking around in saree, I go, ‘WOW, how do you do that!?!?!?!’

Sunday, the church thingie was about more self-discovery. It is amazing how we tend to bury many things deep into ourselves and refused to let certain things go.

I came back with the gift of tongues and an awareness of the presence of the Holy Spirit. Previously, I sort of blend all the Holy Trinity into one image of blurry picture. Now, I have ‘departmentalised’ the Three into different individuals and probably hopefully, prayerfully will find more inner strength.

Faith strengthen. Intentions given to the Lord. In fact, I made a pact with Jesus. It is a foolish one. If You do this (something), I am ready to carry the cross and surrender to You. But in return, You must do this (some simple request) for me. If You promise to do so, here I am Lord. When that happens, I will blog what the pact was.