This is something that I hate myself for it. Maybe I am pretty insecure, low self-esteemed or just plain ‘woman driver’. But I will never drive a man around. Good thing is I never have to and the only few occasions, I just hand over my car to the male.

There was once my boss who moved around in a Jaguar, BMW 7 series and Estima called me from a nearby hotel. He had sent his chauffeur to the airport with the group of visitors and needed a transport back to our office. So, he asked me to fetch him in my Proton Wira Aeroback.

Jeng, jeng, jeng….I got to the hotel in no time at all and his group of visitors were just about to get on the Jag. I got down the car and told him, “Datuk, you drive back ok? Hehehehe, I get nervous if I have to drive you.” Well, I didn’t care what the visitors will think to see the big boss kicked to the driver’s seat of a Proton Wira while they travelled in his Jaguar. And yeap, it is pretty embarrassing that he had to pushed the car seat right to the back to accommodate his fat belly and long legs.

So, of course, I won’t drive my atm anywhere unless he had temporary blinded his eye in a badminton game, had high fever and chills that warrant an ambulance, injured his toe in a bike accident or something that requires a drive to the hospital emergency room (touch wood, no more please!). Otherwise, nay, no way am I going to get his sighs, glances, shocks while I get nervous by the minute.

Now, come to think of it, I just realised that I have never renewed my driving licence before, never know which company I got my car insurance from and how much it is insured. I have also realised that I have never gotten a summon from the traffic police. The only time I was stopped by the traffic police for running a red light, which I argued was yellow, the gods were kind to me.

I was arguing with the two traffic police that the light was yellow. And one of them said he had attended kursus (course) and know it is red eventhough they were standing across the road. So, ding dong, ding dong I kept insisting it was yellow. Then, he whipped out his summon book……Screech….Wham! Bang! An accident happened across the road.

“Encik, sana accident dah, cepat pergi!” (Sir, accident over there, faster go over)

Muahahar…am I lucky or what? This bold, red Lesen Mati ad by MyEG Services Berhad just reminded me how inadequate I am. I need more lessons in Living Skills. I had gotten a few summonses for speeding (through those speed camera) but had never been to a balai to settle any summonses. Semua saya ada runner. Now, if we can settle online, kan bagus? But hor….if you are still pretty hot and comel, I think you can get discount kat balai kut? Betul?

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This is a set of questions I prepared. Things that I had wanted to ask but not sure where to find the answers. Do you agree that our Min. of Transport is not giving us enough education on what to do in an accident? How many times have you been caught in horrible jams when two Chao Ah Beng and Chao Ah Lian or some Mat Rempit or Mutu grazed into each other vehicle? Do you feel like winding down the window and scream at them, “Cibai lu, small accident only, go to the side lah! KNN, stupid or what? ”

Ok, ok, even Terence who have seen some of the freakiest accident already call me ‘You so ganas’ (you are so violent). So, I think it is good we learn some of the things and know what to do in an accident. The questions are from me. The answers are from Terence. Beside being my #1 fansee, or is it the other way round?, he is an expert in matters like these. So, next time if you want to settle summons or wanna know what you should do if you kena an accident, come ask me. I only charge RM200 per questions. He gives the answer for free, of course. I charge for forwarding to him.

QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS

1. If someone makes me angry by blocking my path or cause me inconveniences, can I whack their car and refused to pay for damages?

NO. You cannot go around whacking others property. But in a case of an emergency, the police/ fire brigade can ‘remove’ the vehicle by any means if it is obstructing their duty.

2) I see a lot of stupid people who block a busy road when all they get are small dents due to some silly accident. They got down and started discussing like they had just killed a person. In small accidents like these, say just tiny dents and bumper drop off, what needs to be done?

Firstly, if the vehicle can still be driven, drive to the side of the road or a safe place that is not obstructing traffic. You can actually be summoned for obstructing the flow of traffic.

If the damages are minor, try to settle it there and then. If a police report is made, the guilty party will be fined RM300.00. You do the calculation. (refer to Q8)

3)If we get an accident, those cilaka Ah Bengs will be swarming all over us, giving instructions like very clever like that. Should we listen and bodoh-bodoh follow their instructions like what to do?

I assume you are referring to workshop operators. Those workshops are registered under PIAM (Persatuan Insurans Am Malaysia) to handle accident claims and repairs. They are quite helpful in a way. Because competition is stiff, that’s why you get some claiming to know more than the other. But the claim procedures are the same though.

4) Actually, what is the smart and right things to do in an accident that doesn’t involve any injuries to the drivers?

* Settle it there and then if the damages are minor
* NEVER admit liability
* Note down third party’s particulars (Name, NRIC no, vehicle make/model)
* Note down time and place (Name of road) of accident
* With camera phone and digicams people are so used to carry with them, take a shot of the accident.
* Make a police report within 24 hours
* Inform your Insurance company or your agent
* If you plan to make an insurance claim, the authorized workshop will handle the rest for you

5) Insurance. What are the different classes? Which should we get?

There are 3 different scope of coverage in motor insurance:

Third Party Cover
This cover is combination of :-
(1) Act cover as described above
(2) Indemnity for liability in respect of damage to property belonging to third party

Third party, fire and theft cover
(1) Act cover as described above
(2) Third party cover
(3) Indemnity in the event that the insured vehicle is stolen or damaged by fire

Comprehensive Cover
(1) Combination of Act and Third party
(2) Physical damage to the insured vehicle and its part following accidental
collision and other perils more specifically covered in the policy

Comprehensive would be best.

6) I *touch wood* have never claimed any damages before and my paymaster told me my NCD is very high. How is the rate counted?

A No Claim Discount is awarded when no claims are made for a continuous period of 12 months.

* 1st year – 25%
* 2nd year – 30%
* 3rd year – 38.33%
* 4th year – 45%
* 5th year onwards – 55%

The above discount will apply when you renew your policy.

7) When is it necessary to call the police when we have an accident?

It is necessary to call the police if there are fatalities or major injuries. Or if you are unlucky enough to crash into a 3rd party property like the KLCC. (Don’t worry; the management will call for you then)

Say we kena accident and both parties agreed not to make any claims. Like for e.g. I took pity on a younger (poorer) driver and decided to let them go scot free. I very besar hati wan, rite? But then, this cilaka siginah (spoilt kid) went home but his snakey dad decided to nail me for his son’s mistakes. So, the dad went to make a police report saying I caused the accident. Can I be summoned or charged?

No. The snakey parent cannot nail you if you are not guilty. Traffic policemen, loss adjusters/surveyors and claim examiners are experience enough to determine which party caused the accident. (Yes, those Ah Beng adjusters are trained to do that)

9) From statistics, are women the worse driver compared to men?

Surprisingly, MEN. They like to crash their vehicles more. But accidents are caused mostly by fatigue, speed and poor judgment.

10) Why do Ah Bengs like you get your hair dyed blue?

Don’t know. Self-preference I guess. Yau Yeng Kua!

- END OF Q&A -

Now, how many of you have *touch wood* got into an accident? I had a couple of times, minor ones. I will tell you how an old man scolded me bad words because of his own fault. Did I leave out any important questions? And the best revealation - Men are more prone to accidents. Yay to women drivers.

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