The cicak and the boys (gory and violent, suitable for all ages)

A cicak was stucked to a piece of paper.

(To my overseas readers (heh, as if I have any) cicak is the common lizard found in most households in Malaysia. They are neither pesky nor useful. We live in peace because they eat all the insects in the house and choose the same place to shit every day. Serious, most of them shit at inconspicuous corner.)

5xmom found it under her computer desk.

cicak

“#1, your father is not at home. You are the man of the house. Come and rescue the poor cicak!”

“You go and do it yourself la.”

#2 son came to the rescue with a tweezer and a toothpick. Poor cicak was stucked to a label which was torn from my PC. Real sticky stuff. Following conversations ensue. I shall leave it to your imagination who uttered what. There were four of us plus one toddler.

“Lemme pull it off.”

“Don’t! The poor cicak’s skin will tear if you do.”

“Let’s cut off it’s legs.”

“How about cutting off the label to make it smaller so he can creep away?”

“Cannot. The cicak cannot grip on the wall and will fall.”

“Let’s put it in the freezer!”

“I want to try pry off the glue from it’s legs.”

“So difficult, let’s throw it out of the house. At least if it dies, it won’t stinks the house.”

“Two legs have dislodged, two more only. Have patience, mom, have patience.”

“Aiyah, go get my dumbell, put the cicak in between layers of newspaper and I whack it? Can ah?”

“You bad karma turned into cicak next time.”

“I Christian la, no karma-karma one. I no sked. Cicak dies, cicak rises again.”

“Haiyo….you teach your toddler bad moral lah.”

“You all also never bad moral what. Saving little animals like these. See? Prove my method works.”

“Ei, ei, want to pull off it’s tail or not? You ever seen a cicak’s dislodged tail wriggling before? Nice you know. The tail will wriggle for a long time.”

“Ahh…off you go little cicak. Get out of my mom’s way or she may fry you for dinner.”

tew

“Uncle-uncle dan auntie-auntie sekalian. Please don’t report my mom to the SPCA. She did not suggest all those cruel methods. Just play-play oni.”

*A must-read related to cicak. (sigh, after I myself followed the link + link, I only realised how much things have changed. Blogsphere then and now. When did we screw it up?)

13 Replies to “The cicak and the boys (gory and violent, suitable for all ages)”

  1. Poor lizard!! lol I always had a soft spot for them though lately they are getting on my nerves. Business must be good coz they are shitting like no tomorrow… all over my house!!

    This leng jai again!! lol What about others? Are they camera shy?? This leng jai got potential… must nurture him good good….if not, we’ll have another killer on our hands…. especially Penang young girls got to be careful!! lol

  2. the last time my wife & i went back to malaysia we stayed at my sister’s house..my wife not from malaysia so she was freaked out when there were cicaks in the house & making that ‘tat tat tat’ noise!

  3. I’m VERY scared of lizard. I mean, there are many animals/insects on earth that I’m scared of too.
    But, lizard is the most scary one for me, I don’t know why, although it’s harmless & small. I feel very “geli” when I see it.

    WaHH…Last time, I heard from my grandfather, he said, if the lizard’s tail drops into one’s ear, that person will be deaf. I know it’s not true, but, his words are still in my memory….till now…

    That’s why, till now, when I go back to my kampung(my grandparents’house) during Chinese New Year, I always cover my ears when I sleep in my grandparents’ house which has lots of lizards.
    But….my grandfather is no longer there…

  4. Years ago, when I had an arowana, I used to catch little cicaks and feed them to the fish, watching how the fish, in less than a nanosecond, swallow the lizard. Now with so many mosquitos around, I wish there were more cicaks around.

  5. Lizards=Nuisance
    Hate them so much till i feel like tearing them apart. all they know is shit shit shit, leaving the black and white yingyang shit combination on the walls.

    I’m good in catching lizards, seriously. Let me tell u the technic. If u see it on the wall, use a mop/broom and start sweeping the fella down the wall. Once it free falls and flat on the ground, cover it with your mop/broom(dun worry, u have like 5 secs to do it, cos it goes blank and dunno wat to do after falling) THEN, u take the ‘whack flies’ plastic whacker(like badminton racket) in one hand, and uncover the mop/broom with the other, immediately after that, whack the lizard hard for a few times(2?3?) hahaha it won’t flatten nor juice will flow, it’ll only go dizzy and stay put for a minute. So, during that 1 minute, use paper to flick it up from the floor and maybe like fishtail said “feed them to the arowana”

  6. eeeeeyyyyyeeerrrrrr………..gelinyer!!!!!

    but looks like u n me kena the crazy cheechak syndrome at the same time. i oso keep mentioning n talking abt cheechaks recently. dunno wat is wrong liow – cheechak flu??

    *sneeze n something falls off???*

  7. i hate cicak too…they like to shit on my mattress at the same spot. twice i got to wash the bedsheet just bcoz of one stupid shit then i got clever liau…i use my dotdot’s lampin and place over the spot so i just need to wash the small piece of lampin instead of the whole bedsheet.

    btw, you son is sooooo leng chai.

    kampungkai > pls come and help me catch the rascal (cicak). 😛

  8. wahhh. dramatic rescue, worthy of 911-cicak….. you know ah, one time i caught a rat between my windows… it made a squeky sound like those rubber ducks… interesting. cheers!

  9. reading your cicak story reminded my of my own cicak rescue attempt….there was a time not too long ago, a poor little cicak fell into my kitchen sink. it couldn’t help itself out of it as the sink was deep and slippery. and me…without a second thought took the kitchen towel and tried to ‘rescue’ him…the picture that was playing in mind, was that the cicak would climb up the towel and just like the rescue helicopter…i would leave him up to safety. but the total opposite happened, the cicak started to run around the sink in panic!! and there i was talking to him, urging him to climb the towel. my housemate came along curiously wondering what i was doing…when she saw it, she burst into laughters! frankly, at first, i couldn’t understand what was so funny about a cicak in the sink desperately trying to flee from my rescue attempt. between laughters, she said, ” i don’t think the cicak knows what you are talking about!! Do you speak cicak language? You are giving the cicak a heart attack…” Hahaha…finally the cicak got so tired running around and I just scooped him up with a piece of paper…so much on my fail rescue. =)

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